Page 31 of Love vs The Ooze Monster!
She smiled at him, like he was the snake’s hips.
He pushed her head back down to his erection.
Dave was pretty sure he’d already promised Frances he’d takeherto the Pioneer Picnic on Monday, but what the hell? Leticia was the one giving him casseroles and swallowing his dick, so she deserved some preferential treatment.
Tomorrow night, he was supposed to pick up Frances from her boardinghouse and go to a picture show. He was already having second thoughts about that date, too. All Frances cared about was movie stars. Dave was sick of hearing about Rudolph Valentino. He was arealman, not some silent, black-and-white goof on a screen. Why wasn’t Frances paying more attention tohimand less to that Valentino mook?
Leticia never even mentioned Hollywood. Yeah, she’d definitely earned her spot on his arm at the Pioneer Picnic. Maybe he should…
A sound outside the car caught his attention.
Some kind of slurping, sticky, suctioning noise, that wasn’t coming from Leticia’s mouth. This noise was mixed with the rustling of bushes.
The jalopy was parked in the Volstead graveyard, so nobody should be around at this hour. Dave frowned and glanced over his shoulder, trying to look out the window and into the darkness. Nothing was visible. Not even an animal. He had another vague thought of vampires. Shit, maybe a cemetery had been a bad place to bring a date, considering the strange goings on.
Leticia’s redhead popped up, hearing the noise, too. “What’s that?”
“Don’t know.” The car’s headlights were on. Craning his head to peer out the windshield, he didn’t see anything in that direction, either. Just rows of tombstones and mausoleums.
But still he heard the same sound.
Dave’s scowled deepened. “Hang on. I’ll handle it.” He reluctantly opened the car door and got out, fastening his pants. “Anybody there? This is the police. Identify yourself.”
The noise stopped.
He grunted, satisfied that he’d frightened away whoever was trying to get a peek. “There you go, baby. All handled.”
“Gosh, you’re just thebest, Dave.” Leticia sounded duly impressed with his talents. “I was scared to death, but you got it all under control…”
“Run!” A male voice suddenly screamed.
Leticia and Dave turned towards the frantic shout, just as a wide-eyed guy in an all-white suit came stumbling out of the woods at the edge of the graveyard. Dave recognized him as Rico Peretti, one of Boyd Cassiday’s men.
Everybody on the force knew Cassiday’s men, because Cassiday’s skinny bookkeeper paid big money for their protection. Not that Dave ever looked too hard at the girl’s body. Or her face. Or got within ten feet of her.No onedid, if they liked having an unventilated brain. Boyd was a reasonable guy about most things, but he was positively unhinged about that bespectacled woman. As far as Dave was concerned, any dumb-shit who tried to poach Boyd’s dame was on his own. It was a death wish to get between them.
Besides, Cassiday made mint on booze and the cops all saw a share of the profits. That mattered a lot more than a few dead Lotharios. Especially since the rest of Boyd’s business ran like a top. Regular payments to the department and very little ancillary crime.
Seeing Rico sprinting through the graveyard, probably hopped-up on weed, was quite a shock. Boyd usually ran such a tight ship.
“We gotta get out of here!” Rico bellowed, not slowing down. He dashed right by Dave, in front of the car. “Go!” He ran up a small hill, trying every mausoleum door. When one finally opened, he ducked inside, as if he was trying to hide.
Dave squinted after him, wondering if there was some way he could parlay the weird encounter into a bonus. Not even the penny-pinching bookkeeper could begrudge him some extra cash, if Rico was up to no good and Dave just happened to apprehend him.
Leticia didn’t seem to know what to make of Rico’s mad dash, either. “What in the world…?” She stopped talking suddenly, her eyes going wide, her mouth opening but no sound coming out.
Dave turned to see what the new problem was… and that’s when he saw the vampire.
Only itwasn’ta vampire. It was some huge, horrible jellyfish. About the size of a car, it had long spindly tentacles. Covered with scalloped translucent flaps, they grew out of its body. They poked straight through the monster’s flesh, every which way. Some were being used to support its bulbous weight. Others were waving around like antenna. Caught in the headlights of the police cruiser, the creature glowed as if its flesh was thinned out to its breaking point and filled with orange jelly.
Dave blinked stupidly, trying to process what he was looking at.
Leticia found her voice. Her scream was shrill and at full-volume. She wrenched the car door open and fell out onto the road. Her clothes askew, her shoes missing, she ran for her life.
That just seemed to draw the monster’s attention.
As Dave watched in open-mouthed shock, the tentacles snaked after Leticia. It all happened in a matter of seconds. Grabbing her leg, it pulled her right off her feet and dragged her towards its gelatinous form. The slime that dripped from the creature melted her skin. Everywhere the goo touched --the gravel road, a nearby tree, Leticia’s stockings-- smoking, burning, bubbling marks appeared.
Eating right through flesh.
