Page 47 of Love vs The Ooze Monster!
Frances hesitated, because she wasn’t heartless. “He was dying of something horrible?”
“Prostitutes.” Mrs. Patten nodded, like that made perfect sense. “Lust was eating away at his soul. I freed him of it. Amen.”
“See,thisis why I never liked drinking your damn herbal tea.”
Mrs. Patten made an indignant “humph” sound. “As if I’d poison my own tenants.” She paused. “…Without a good reason.”
“I’m thinking you poisoned plenty of people. There’s talk of orange ooze out by the funeral home. Leroy always said that Versicolor Hydrozoa turned a person orange, if they ate it. Right before it killed them dead.” Frances made a face. “He didn’t mention the ooze, though.”
“I can’t account for that part, either. I imagine Norris’ swill was tainted with something that reacted with the flower and made the results all the more potent.” Mrs. Patten casually adjusted her unattractive sack of a handbag. “Not even I knew just how successful my plan would be, really. A few petals sprinkled into the tubs that he kept in the basement of the funeral home and,” she shrugged, “God’s will be done.”
“Forty-something people are dead, including Norris.”
“Bootleggers and their immoral customers deserve what they get. Even Mr. Sterno. I hate to lose a quiet and respectful renter, but he brought it all on himself.” Mrs. Patten’s eyes narrowed. “Just as that harlot Miss Harrison will be punished for fornicating with a man, before marriage. She didn’t come home last night and I’m hearingverytroubling rumors about her employer. I should never have rented to a Catholic.”
“Iknewshe was sleeping with Boyd Cassiday.” Frances couldn’t help a pleased nod at being proven right. “He’s a bootlegger, too.”
“Shameful.” Mrs. Patten lamented. “I have three supposedly upstanding boarders and you’ve all proven to be disappointments. How do you think that makes me look? My dear husband’s grandfather founded this town. I have a responsibility to keep Volstead respectable.”
“That’s going to be real hard to do from jail.” Frances wasn’t a girl to beat around the bush. “And I’m going to tell Dave all about you, unless you pay up to keep my mouth closed. He’s a cop, if you recall.”
Mrs. Patten was outraged. “You’re blackmailing me?”
“OfcourseI’m blackmailing you.” Frances rolled her eyes. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“Aladywould never stoop so low.”
“I don’t have time to be a lady. I’m going to be a movie star.” Frances was fairly pleased with that retort. She was opening her mouth to begin making demands for massive payoffs, when something moved on the street in front of them.
Some huge and globular jellyfish-like creature.
It glowed orange and headed towards the center of town, using long tentacles as legs. Cars swerved out of its path, running into street lights and mailboxes. The drivers goggled at the monster, blind to everything else.
Frances couldn’t blame them. She stopped walking, her eyes going wide. It was like being swept inside of a movie, where impossible things were happening right in front of her. Time lost all meaning, as she gaped up at the creature.
Other people were a bit quicker to react. They were scattering in all directions, crying out in fear and panic. Gunshots sounded. As one woman darted away, a snakelike appendage whipped out and ensnared her. It dragged her right into its gooshy body, eating her without even using a mouth. It didn’t seem tohavea mouth. It was just a big mush of grabbing arms and remorseless hunger.
And it was headed right towards Frances.
“That isnota vampire.” She whispered in terrified awe. Or maybe she just thought it. Everything was a daze. She had the vague notion to run, but she didn’t have time to carry it through.
Her gaze was still fixed on the orange jellyfish, when from the corner of her eye, she saw Mrs. Patten pull the gun from her unattractive sack of a handbag.
“There’salwaystime to be a lady.” Mrs. Patten scolded and shot Frances right in the head.
Chapter Fourteen
Get a wiggle on: (1920s slang) To move quickly and get out of a place
All of Main Street was getting a wiggle on. People were running every which way, trying to escape the ooze monster. Mabel was running towards it.
At least, shethoughtshe was running towards it. She didn’t see it, but she was following the noise. She wasn’t exactly sure what she intended to do once she found the creature, but she had to try to stop it from destroying the town. Lew had left Volstead to her, so Mabel had a responsibility to protect it from giant, mutant jellyfish.
She turned onto Main Street, fighting against the rush of panicked pedestrians.
“Mabel! Dammit, this is a lousy idea.” Boyd was right beside her. “We’re moving so fast that we’ve lost all the guards I have watching you.”
“Wehaveto move fast! We have to stop the monster!”
