Page 151 of Happily Ever Witch
No one had magic like Esmeralda. It was a simple fact. The witch had just casually spoken to him in his mind, because it didn’t even occur to her that it was impossible. Because, she’d apparently been connecting with him all of her life. Because, no one ever told her she couldn’t or, if theyhadtold her, she wasn’t paying any attention. If anything, she consistently underestimated her abilities.
If she said she could get into the Club Palace undetected, then she could get into the Club Palace undetected. Trevelyan trusted that. He trusted her. As her loving husband, it was his job to support her villainy. To help her believe in her own power.
Keeping her safe was vital, but he needed to balance that with ensuring that she was happy and fulfilled. The slow evolution of his priorities solidified in its new and permanent orientation. So only one truth remained:
Esmeralda was all that mattered.
He slowly exhaled, feeling calmer.
A movement outside the cage drew his attention. A cadre of nervous looking playing card guards stood there. Rather than a show of intimidation, the large force seemed to be for their own protection. They were terrified of him, which was gratifying, but also annoying.
Not even Trevelyan could escape two-dozen armed men, with no magic. If they’d been a bit braver, and come in as a group of six or eight, he could’ve easily slain them all and escaped. It wasn’t fair to give them any actual credit for thwarting his plans, of course. No. They’d stumbled across the tactic by complete accident. The playing cards had lucked into survival through their own cowardice and ineptitude.
(Sadly, sometimes stupidity paid off. Trevelyan knew that better than most. No matter where he went, it was the same: Gaggles of morons surrounded him.)
Trevelyan flashed the guards an irritated look. “If you’re here to execute me, I should warn you, my mate wants me alive. …And I make sure my mate gets what she wants.”
“We’re not here to execute you.” The leader of the men swallowed audibly, his unpleasant face scrunched up in distaste and fear. “You’re just ordered to come with us.”
Everyone in the Club Kingdom seemed particularly unlikable. Trevelyan had only met a few of its denizens, so far, but he’d killed or was planning to kill one hundred percent of them. It was a grim statistic, even for a dragon.
“Where exactly are you taking me, if not to the gallows?” He asked.
The guard edged closer to the cell door, poised to flee at the first sudden movement. “We’re escorting you to the trial.”
Trevelyan stared at him blankly. “The what?”
***
Glamours didn’t set off magic sensors. At least, not when Esmeralda used them.
So long as she didn’t go too big with her spells, her powers got disguised right along with her outward appearance. She was pretty sure that it didn’t work that way for all witches, but transmogrifying came naturally to her. She barely even had to think about using her Good energy to make it happen. A little dash of magic and poof!
Esmeralda strolled through the gates of the Club Castle and the magic sensors never flickered. She was just another hardworking playing card guard.
Getting used to her new very, very thin form was the most challenging part of the mission. It felt like a stiff breeze wouldblow her away. Playing card guards had short limbs, so she had to swing her whole body on the diagonal to walk. It was completely ineffective. No wonder it was so easy to beat these dopes.
A few other guards walked past her and saluted. Esmeralda nodded in reply. She’d made herself a nine. That seemed like a high enough rank that no one would question her movements, but not so exalted that she’d get recognize as an imposter.
It was all working great!
Nobody looked twice, as she walked right into the palace courtyard. Now, she just needed a way to get inside the castle and find Trevelyan.
Unfortunately, there were talking doorknobs on all the doors and they seemed to be some kind of security system. Being as inconspicuous as possible, Esmeralda watched people come and go through them. Each time someone approached, the doorknob would ask them some nonsensical riddle.
“What is down and up, whenever it goes sideways?”
“Why is a river fish like a teaspoon full of tennis shoes?”
“How can you be in two places at once at three in the afternoon?”
Everyone had to solve a riddle properly, before the doorknobs would let them pass. And “properly” seemed to mean saying the very first thing that popped into your head, no matter how stupid.
Esmeralda was tempted to try and brazen through. How wrong could her responses really be? No one else’s answers made any sense and they seemed to work fine.
Question: What is a loaf divided by a knife? Answer: Red.
Seriously,what the helldid that even mean? Nothing! It was pure gibberish. Esmeralda was pretty sure she could bullshit her way through some word-salad riddle. If no answer was right, then no answer was wrong.
