Page 15 of The Alien Who Saved Christmas
“Impossible.” He crossed all four of his arms over his chest. “In every known world, the females are all but gone. Especially, the non-hideous ones, like you.”
“Aw, you say the nicest things.”
Xane ignored her dry tone. “You should have kept the robes on. These men are too drunk and beaten down to immediately attack you. But that is pure luck. Do you have any idea what you risked in coming to this place alone, looking as you do?”
“I guess I should have brought my hand sanitizer.” Sadie took a sip of the sludgy brown liquid in her triangle-shaped glass. “Melted aliens smellawfulthough…” She stopped short, registering the taste of her drink. “Hang on. What is this?”
“Leegos.Be cautious.It’s strong.”
“Thisis Legos?” Sadie almost laughed. “It’s chocolate!”
Maybe not exactly Earth chocolate, but close enough to be almost indistinguishable. Testing her theory, Sadie finishedthe whole thing in three large gulps, ignoring the way Xane’s extraordinary eyes widened in alarm. She took a second to see if she felt any burning, tingling, or other buzziness. Nope. The aliens’ super-strong drink was literally a chocolate milkshake. However they metabolized cocoa; it must have been way different than humans, because she felt fine.
Xane watched her closely for signs of inebriation and/or death. “Most beings your size would now be passing out.” He sounded halfway impressed.
Sadie snorted. “Lightweights.” She signaled the robot waiter for another milkshake. Calories didn’t count when you were kidnapped by extraterrestrials. All she’d had to eat in weeks were flavorless nutrition cubes from the See-Through Alien Kidnappers’ supplies. “I’d offer you some, but it might interfere with the drugs in your system. You need to be careful, until you recover your strength.”
He glowered at her. “My strength is ten times what yours is.”
“There’s no need to be embarrassed, Xane. You’re sick. Everyone gets sick.”
“I’mnotsick.”
“Do you want some soup? Do they have soup in space?”
He sighed like he was suffering. A lot.
The man was not in the mood to talk about his frailty, so she let it drop. For now. Grabbing a new drink from the robot, she considered her next move. “Okay, so women are valuable on this planet.” She mused to herself, getting back on track. “Can I make that work for us?”
Xane’s jaw tightened. “If you wish to trade sex for coins, you will do it without my input.” He intoned.
She flashed him an aggravated look. “I’m not an intergalactic hooker, Xane. Jesus! That’s not what I meant. I won’t sleep with someone to solve my money problems.”
His tension eased slightly. “You have money problems?” He scoffed. “You spent eighty thousand credits like they were sand this afternoon.”
“Hence the money problems. I used all my cash buying you.”
“That was stupid.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Regardless of your poor choices, your finances are not an issue. You are a non-hideous woman. All you have to do is exist, and the universe’s most powerful males will beg for you.”
“That’s incredibly gender normative.”
“Is that a positive thing?”
“It’s a negative thing, actually. What if I don’twanta powerful man? What if I wanted a powerful woman or to stay powerfully single?”
“You are attracted to females?”
“Not really, but Icouldbe.”
“It would be as thankless for you, as it is for most males. Women are nearly extinct.”
“No, we aren’t. I’m a woman and I’m not extinct. Your universe is sexist. And also way too binary. Don’t men go with men around here?”
“Of course they do. Women are nearly extinct.”
