Page 17 of The Alien Who Saved Christmas
“That’s what I said. And once I get back to Earth, I won’t need a spaceship. I drive a ’97 Honda. So, you can take it back to Ranarynn.”
“Rtaharion.”
“That’s what I said. You’ll drop me off before the corks pop on New Year's Eve and fly away home.” She waggled her fingers in the air to simulate his trip through hyperspace. “Easy. Effective.Sane. We both get what we want, and no one has to be a slave or a prostitute.”
Xane brooded over the plan, looking for flaws. He was such a fun date.
Sadie sipped her second chocolate shake and waited.
“This lunacy is why you need the Vipri?” He asked after a long length of time.
“Yep.” She shrugged. “But I don’t know a lot about this planet. Oranyplanet, besides Earth. That might complicate things.”
“It’s not complicated. Your lack of knowledge will kill you. That is very simple.”
She rolled her eyes at his morbid assessment. “With that kind of attitude, I would’ve been dead weeks ago and you’d be working in the octopus mines.”
“What is ‘octopus’?”
“Doesn’t matter. The point is, I could useyourhelp and you could usemyhelp.” She spread her palms. “Let’s work together.”
Xane was quiet again, his gaze centered on her persuasive smile. “Your teeth are very small.” He muttered. “Shiny ornaments, ill-suited for combat. You would be useless in a fight.”
“You do the fighting, then. Once you’re better and not so fragile.”
“A Rtaharion isneverfragile.”
Sadie kept talking, ignoring his touchiness. “Meanwhile, I’ll do the part where we try crazy shit and steal ducklings.” She arched a brow. “What do you say?”
Xane considered that distribution of labor, his eyes still on her face. “Dammit.” He muttered and the word was defeated.
Sadie beamed, taking that as an agreement. “Great! Now, if I create a distraction, can you figure out where the duckling is stashed?”
Xane might be her new teammate, but he was still pretty untrusting. “What kind of distraction?” He asked suspiciously.
She made a considering face. “I’m thinking Mariah Carey.”
Chapter Five
Jingle moons, Jingle moons,
Jingle all night long.
Jingle moons, Jingle moons,
That’s kind of this whole song.
Hey!
From “Jingle Moons”
A Christmas Carol for Non-Earthlings by Sadie Malone
Being the only girl in town meant that every night was Ladies Night on Corono.
Sadie had no problem keeping all the bar-patrons’ eyes centered on her, especially when she was standing on a stage. Without a karaoke machine, her musical choices were limited, of course. She’d never been great at memorizing lyrics. But Christmas music played on a loop at the diner. There were some earworm-y songs she couldn’t forget, even if she tried.
Sadie took a deep breath and began humming the unmistakable beginning ofAll I Want For ChristmasIs You. “You guys can clap along.” She told her fascinated audience. “I mean, those of you with hands, anyway. Or tentacles would be fine, I guess. Just stay on the beat.”
