Page 9 of The Alien Who Saved Christmas
The woman seemed to mistake his stunned silence for terror. She held up her palms in a gesture of peace. “I swear, you don’t have to be scared of me. I’m not going to hurt you.”
His head whipped around to glower at her. The swift movement increased his sensation of vertigo. “Rtaharions are scared ofnothing.”
“I was just trying to escape.” She went on passionately, like she didn’t understand that Xane came from a people of blood and war. Like she’d never even heard of the Rtaharions. “And the only thing I had on me was that spritz-y hand sanitizer stuff. Like in the mini-sized spray bottles. I’m a waitress, so I had it in my pocket when they kidnapped me.”
Xane had no idea what most of that gibberish meant. It wasn’t just the drugs muddling his mind. Not many people spoke to Xane. Being a slave didn’t encourage conversation. Being a Rtaharion encouraged even less. It felt strange to have someone using his name and talking to him. It was hard to be sure whether he was rusty at communicating or if she was just using words that did not exist.
“So, I thought, maybe I could use it like pepper-spray and grab the keys from them.” She continued chattily. “Because alcohol burns if you get it in your eyes, you know?”
“What is ‘alcohol’?” The translator wasn’t giving him the meaning of that word.
“It’s just a disinfectant. It’s good for you!” She hesitated. “I mean, some types of alcohol can make you sick, if you drink too much. But nobody drinks hand sanitizer, because it’s dangerous. Otherwise, it’s perfectly safe.”
Xane rubbed at his pounding skull, trying to make sense of her circular logic.
“So anyway, I sprayed the guys, when they got close to my cage. Only instead of just burning them, the hand sanitizer kind of melted them.”
“Youmeltedthe Lythions.” He repeated, trying to understand how such a thing could be possible.
“Yep. Like I doused them in acid.” She cringed a bit at the memory. “I took a chemistry class at my college, but we didnotcover that scenario. The aliens’ faces dripped all over the floor. The smell was terrible.”
Xane glanced back over at the graves. They had suffered? Good.
She followed his gaze, chewing on her lower lip again. It was a pity to twist the soft, rosy flesh into such shapes. “I’m not sure about funeral rites for aliens, so I did the best I could. Although, Idothink they were jerks. For real. They abducted me right out of the diner’s parking lot. I’msureI’ll be fired.”
“You fear someone will light you aflame?” Doubtful. She was worth too much.
“No, that’s not what ‘firing’…” She trailed off with a sigh. “Never mind. Let’s keep moving forward.” She turned to face him. “My name is Sadie Malone, by the way.”
“Say-dee-mal-own?”
“Sadie.” She stressed the pronunciation. “I’m from Earth. Do you know where that is?”
“No.”
“I’m a human. Have you heard of us?”
“No.”
“Do you know how to fly a spaceship, maybe?”
“No.”
“Great.” She puffed out an irritated breath. “Okay. Doesn’t matter. We’ll take this one step at a time. First, we need to get the ducklings.”
The woman was either an accomplished liar or feebleminded. “The what-lings?”
“The yellow fuzzy aliens that went for sale right after you. They’re allegedly pilots. I’m hoping they can fly this damn thing, since neither of us knows how.” She gestured towards the H-77 Cruiser. “That’s what I was trying to tell you earlier.”
Xane blinked. “The Vipri?” He choked out, understanding her intentions.
“Sure. Vipri.” She shrugged dismissively. “I saw a cyclops-guy taking one of them into that bar earlier. Hey, hang on…” Her head tilted. “What is the tavern serving, if not alcohol?”
“Leegos.”
She stared at him for a beat. “Right. Legos. So, we need to steal a duckling from Legoland. Sounds doable.” She paused. “I mean, it’s notreallystealing, though. We’re setting the little fella free. We’re the ones in the right…”
Xane cut off her crazed idea, before it went any further. “No.”
