Page 32 of A Knight To Call My Own
“Ian?” she repeated, although the tone of her voice did not have the same lilting quality it had but an instant ago.
“Aye.”
He swung his leg over the saddle and dropped to the ground. “Connor,” he called out quietly as the man made his way to his side. “Double back and cover our tracks, and do it well. I have no desire to be back on the run ’til we have given the horse’s adequate time to recuperate from traveling at such speed and distance this night.”
“Aye, me laird,” he replied and hurried off in the direction from whence they had come.
Satisfied his instructions would be obeyed, he returned his interest to his wife, who was weaving in the saddle. He stretched out his arms towards her, and Lynet leaned down, placing her hands upon his shoulders to slide down the length of his body. Luckily, he was prepared when her knee’s buckled beneath her as he continued holding on to his lady. He grasped her firmly around her waist to offer her the support she stood in need of ’til she regained her feet.
Her forehead rested upon his chest, and, for the first time, he realized just how small his lovely wife truly was whilst she tried to reclaim her breath. Her hands rose up onto his torso, and he felt her fists grasp the edges of his tunic. He was about to lean down to place a tender kiss upon her head when she reacted as though he were in truth their enemy and not Calum.
“Get your hands off me!” She all but condemned him with her tone as she gave him a push to distance herself from him.
He rocked back on his heels only to stare down into her mutinous, angry blue eyes. “Whatever is the matter?” he retorted.
“How can you even ask that of me, given what happened back there?” She pointed her arm into the air, but the direction she tried to draw attention to was the wrong way, not that it mattered. Ian knew what she referenced, but there was not much he could do about what had transpired. He did what he needed in order for him to save her, although the price had, indeed, been high.
“You know what the cost of war can be, Lynet. I should not have to explain to you the price that sometimes must be paid,” Ian murmured.
Her eyes betrayed the true extent of her emotions, as though she had written them out on parchment for the entire world to read. Her hand shakily pushed away a lock of blonde hair that had fallen across her brow. She attempted to smother her cry of despair, but instead choked on the sob that tore from her lips in a gasp of sorrow.
He continued to observe her, and he had the distinct feeling she would blame him for Rolf’s death. She clutched at the plaid he had thrown around her to keep the chill away, but as she raised her face to him again, her eyes confirmed his worst fears.
“You just left him there,” she whimpered so softly with tears running down her cheeks that he barely heard her voice.
“Lynet I-”
“You left him there!” Her voice echoed in the air as she yelled out in misery. “You left him there with his blood seeping into the cold, hard ground amongst strangers and for the crows to come and pick away at his body!”
“You are being unreasonable, Lynet.”
“Do not tell me I am being unreasonable,” she spat out angrily. “You have no notion what I have been through since I was taken from Berwyck.”
Ian sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “Aye, you may have that aright, but you must surely know we were outnumbered. Or have you not thought of that, as you accuse me of leaving behind a comrade whilst I tucked my tail between my legs and ran away like a coward?”
“I never said you were a coward. Only that you should have returned to save him.”
“He was past saving, Lynet. Rolf knew the dangers we were facing. He and I both did what we needed in order to secure your freedom.”
“He was my friend!” she cried out. “I thought he was yours, as well.”
He discounted her words, knowing she was hurting, but he began to also wonder what her true feelings had been for Rolf. “You make me believe from your speech you loved him,” Ian said brusquely. “Did you?”
“Of course, I loved him, but-”
“Then maybe you should have handfasted with him, instead,” Ian blurted out. “It could just as easily have been me who lies dead in the forest, instead of him.”
“You did not let me finish,” she returned harshly.
“I am sorry for the loss of the one you declare to have loved,” Ian continued on bitterly whilst ignoring her last statement. “If I could switch places with him in order to make you happy, then I would. ’Tis an impossible task for me to change what is done. I hope you will be able to surmise such a fact for yourself, once you can think clearly again.”
“Now who is being unreasonable,” Lynet fumed. “You automatically assume I wish ’twas you instead of Rolf who is in need of burying. I never spoke such to you, did I?”
He did not answer her, since he did not know how to calm her rising temper. “How are we supposed to live as man and wife if you harbor feelings for a man who is dead, Lynet?” Ian asked harshly.
A snort escaped her, and she shook her head then gathered the tartan over her head. “How little you truly know me, Ian.”
“I know you well enough,” he began ’til she held her hand up. He clamped his lips together with a snap.
