Page 14 of Sloth
“Leave it to me. Don’t you worry about a thing, except for picking out that movie, okay?” He smiles, and it fills my chest with a warmth I’ve been missing out on my whole life.
“Okay,” I whisper back at him, heading for the couch and finding the remote. When I see the framed picture of me and Matthew on our wedding day staring back at me, I take it down and slide it under the couch.
CHAPTER NINE
LUKE
Dolores Richards really knows how to overstay her welcome. She’s sipping slowly from the ugly china tea set Matthew and Erin got as a wedding gift, ensuring that she will be the last guest to leave. I look across the room at Erin. She’s busy picking up the paper plates and cleaning up after everyone with Mom. She looks exhausted, and when she glances up at me, she offers me a sad little smile that I should be punished for finding so sexy. I push my shoulder off the beam I’m resting against and head straight toward her.
“Here, I can do that; you sit down.” I take the trash bag from her hands and gesture to the couch.
“Jesus lives.” My dad huffs a sarcastic laugh from the armchair he’s sitting in, but I pay him no mind and get on with cleaning up the house.
“Bryce,” Mom warns him with a stern look, but he doesn’t seem to care. He doesn’t care about anything anymore; his eyes are empty, and so is his soul.
“It really was a lovely send-off.” Dolores takes a nibble from the flapjacks Mom made because they were Matthew’s favorite. While Erin flops her head back against the couch and takes a long, tired breath.
I told her having people back here after the service was a bad idea, but Mom insisted on it. By the look on Erin’s face now, she’s regretting the fact she took Mom's side. Especially now that she’s sitting awkwardly beside Dolores, watching and waiting for her to give a signal that she’s ready to leave. I continue cleaning up after all those who turned out to pay respects to my brother. The whole town showed up, all of them with kind words and memories of my brother they wanted to share. I listened to a lot of stories today, but I didn’t take many of them in. I was too busy being distracted by how beautiful Erin looked and worrying about how hard today must be for her.
“I think we’re about done,” Mom sighs as she looks around the open space. Today's been just as hard for her; she’s put on a brave face, and I can see that it’s not gonna last for much longer.
“Why don’t you and Dad head on home? You could give Mrs. Richards here a ride on the way,” I suggest, knowing that Erin would appreciate some time alone. She’s been incredible today; in fact, she’s been incredible since this whole thing happened. Laying the man she thought she was gonna spend the rest of her life with in the ground can’t have been easy for her, and I wish there was a way that I could make all this easier.
“I think that's a damn good idea.” Dad stands up from the chair and offers Mrs. Richards his hand.
“That's very kind of you, Bryce, but I don’t want to trouble you.” She hands Erin her cup and saucer and picks up her purse as she takes the hand he offers.
“No trouble at all.” Mom heads over and kisses Erin goodbye. While dad puts on his hat and heads straight out the door.
“Now, if you need anything, you call.” Mom starts giving Erin her usual goodbye speech while I start thinking of all the jobs I can do around the yard. I need to keep busy so the thoughts in my head don’t escalate. Me living here with Erin is becomingmore challenging. My urges are getting harder to keep under control, and I can’t let myself slip.
“Bye, Mom.” I kiss her cheek after I’ve guided her and Mrs. Richards to the door, and when I close it and turn back around, Erin is standing in the middle of the room looking lost. She’s staring at me. Staring right at me like she’s wanting me to do something. I just don’t know what that something is.
“I should…umm.” She looks down at the cup and saucer in her hand and quickly heads for the basin, shaking her head like she’s disappointed in herself. It’s wrong to notice how beautiful my brother's widow looks in the tight, black dress she chose for today, but I can’t help it. I can’t help anything, I feel when I’m around her.
“Shit.” I hear her curse after something smashes, and when I race over and look over her shoulder, I see the broken cup and blood dripping from her finger.
“Here,” I turn the faucet to cold and lift her hand up so it’s beneath the stream of water, holding it in mine and watching the water run red.
“That was part of a set.” She sounds sad as more blood drips from her finger onto the broken china.
“Don’t worry about that.” I realize how close my lips are to her neck and have to steady my breathing. Why, if God exists, would he put something so perfect just within my reach yet so out of bounds?
“I…I was being careless and?—”
“Shhhh,” I whisper gently in her ear to calm her down. “Ain’t no use crying over broken china,” I tell her.
“It’s spilled milk.” Erin shocks me when all her angst turns to laughter. “It's no use crying over spilled milk.” She looks over her shoulder at me, and with her lips so close to mine, I can almost taste them again. Slowly, I close the gap between them. I kiss her soft, sweet lips while she’s vulnerable and at herweakest, and when I realize how selfish I’m being, I quickly pull away.
“Erin, I’m sorry.” I could kick myself for putting her in this situation, especially today. “I…I just.”
She shocks me when she turns her body so it’s fully facing mine, then, grabbing my shirt, she drags my lips back onto hers.
“Please don’t be sorry,” she whispers against them before filling my mouth with her tongue and crossing her hands behind my head to ensure I don’t pull away.
This can’t be happening on the day we’ve buried my brother, I can not be making out with his wife in his kitchen. I should pull away, tell her to stop. Remind her that this is madness, but instead, I slide my hands under her ass and lift her up onto the basin. I place my body between her thighs and kiss the hell outta her lips.
“This is wrong,” I tell her in between kisses.
