Page 28 of Sloth
“I don’t know,” I tell her honestly, trying to ignore the huge knot in my stomach as I take the bag and walk back out to the car.
“Hold up. How can you not know? Have you…Erin, will you just stand still and talk to me?” she yells, and when I turn around and see her standing in the middle of the sidewalk looking worried, I realize that I have no choice but to tell her the truth.
“I’ve been sleeping with Luke,” I admit, wondering how this could have happened. I’ve taken my pill religiously for the past twelve months.
“Luke?Luke!?” I can’t make out if she's shocked, angry, or if she’s gonna have an aneurysm.
“I know it’s a shock, but I need you to be the stable one right now.” I grab her arm and drag her toward the diner onthe opposite side of the road because there is no time like the present. “This could just be a false alarm.” I try assuring her and myself, but it’s not fucking working.
“Have you had a period since Matthew died?” she questions me, and I shake my head as tears build up behind my eyes. If I am pregnant and the baby is his, I don’t know how I’m going to feel. Things between me and Luke are so perfect right now. For the first time in my life, I’m happy. How is it possible for Matthew to still be ruining my life when he’s dead?
“Have you told Luke?”
“No, I’m not gonna tell him unless there's something to tell.” The bell above the door chimes as we step through it, and I nod politely at the server as I guide my best friend, clutching the pregnancy test in my hand, straight through to the restroom.
“You know, it would be kinda cool if you are knocked up; we’d be pregnant together.” She smiles, and I shake my head and step inside one of the cubicles.
“I can’t believe you're doing this here,” she calls out over the stall at me.
“I can’t believe I broughtyoufor moral support,” I call back, doing what I need to do and popping the cap back over the stick before I set a timer on my phone.
“Who else would you bring?” She smiles sarcastically when I come out and place it on the basin unit in front of us. “So if it’s been so long since your last period, why are you taking the test now?” She asks me the same question I was asking her a few weeks ago.
“I honestly didn't even realize I was late. Then yesterday the smell of Mary’s muffins made me want to vomit, and the fact my boobs are sore made me realize that it’s been a real long time since I had one.”
“Probibly too distracted by all that sex you’ve been having with your brother-in-law.” She raises her eyebrows at me. “Ican’t believe you didn’t tell me you were hooking up with Luke. When this crisis is over, I want details,” she warns me.
“My life's been like a whirlwind lately, I just haven’t been focused,” I admit.
“Yeah, well, screwing your dead husband's brother will do that to a girl,” she points out.
“Can you just not be clever for…” I pull out my phone and check how much longer I have to wait for a result. “Two minutes?” I beg her.
“I can try.” She makes me no promises and stands patiently in silence while we wait for time to pass.
I jump when the timer goes off, and Liza stares at me expectantly.
“You do it,” I tell her. I'm too scared to look at the damn thing.
“Me?” She points to herself.
“Just pick it up and check the result.” I close my eyes and blow out a breath, feeling as if my chest is gonna collapse.
“Okay.”
I can hear my own heartbeat while I wait for her to tell me my fate.
“Congratulations, Momma!” she squeals, wrapping her arms around me and knocking off my balance.
I quickly snatch the test from her hands to check she’s not wrong, and when I see the positive line, I feel my whole world crumble.
“Are you gonna go straight home and tell Luke? You know, rip off the Band-Aid?” Liza asks when I pull up outside her house.
“Have you told Koben or your folks yet?” I turn the question on to her and watch her face drop.
“It’s complicated,” she tells me with a guilty look on her face.
“Tell me about it.” I sigh, looking out the windshield and wondering how I’m gonna explain all this to Luke. I really don’t know how I didn’t pick up on this before. I hate to say it, but Liza is right. I’ve been distracted.
