Page 46 of Sloth
I think of the life growing inside me; another thing for him to control. Another form of manipulation he can use against me, and I cock the rifle and slide the cartridges into the barrel.
One. Two. Snap. I shut it back up so it’s loaded and ready. He’ll have no need to call me a useless cunt today. I see his horse in the distance, a horse he takes such good care of, and as I step closer to him, I see him cradling the steer, stroking its head to try and keep it calm despite the agony he’s in.
“Hurry the fuck up!” he yells at me, trying to stop the steer from thrashing, and when the steer's strength overcomes his, it manages to somehow get on its feet. I watch as it bolts towards the trees for cover.
“Take a shot!” Matthew yells angrily. But I’ve never shot a rifle before. I’ve never killed another living creature.
“Take the fucking shot, you dumb fucking bitch!” he yells, his voice echoing through the trees and rattling through my head. I wish I could be that steer, free of his hold, running through the woods, even if it meant I’d slowly bleed to death with my guts on the outside. At least I would have known I’d controlled my own fate, instead of slowly being crushed.
“Take thefuckingshot!” he yells at me again, and I raise the rifle, ready to do what he says. Only I don’t aim for the trees.I stare at the shock on his face, and I see the flash of fear in the eyes that his evil hides behind. And I take thefuckingshot. I take the shot right through his skull. His brains explode, and he drops to the ground. Then, before I get too close, just to be sure he can’t get up, I shoot another one.
The ringing in my ears is deafening, but the freedom is tranquil. I sit on a rock beside the river, watching the water flow past, turning red when a trail of blood seeps its way down to the river’s edge and feeds into the water, and when the ringing in my ears stops, I stand up, pick up the gun, and head back to the car.
I sit at the kitchen table knowing that I have to do something. The pretty dress Matthew’s mom bought me is covered in his blood. I can feel it dripping from my hair onto my face, and when I wipe away the tears that are spilling between my lips, I taste it there, too.
“I hear that your husband is out for the da—” I look up and see Liza, holding a bottle of wine in her hand and staring at me like she’s in some kind of horror movie.
“Fuck, Erin! Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?” She races toward me, checking me over like she’s scared I’m the one who hurt.
“He told me to take the shot,” I explain.
“What?” She looks at the rifle on the table.“Erin, what the hell happened?” She crushes my head between her hands, forcing me to focus on her, and now his blood is on her, too.
“He told me to take the shot, so I shot him.” I look up at her and start to cry. “I ended the suffering. All of it.”
“Come with me, honey.” She stands me on my feet and guides me to the bathroom, stripping off my clothes and turning on the faucet, and when I turn my back on her to get inside the shower, I hear the gasp she makes and figure that she knows now.
“Erin, what happened to your back?” I glance over my shoulder and see her hand covering her mouth, her eyes dancing over all the scars he’s marred me with.
“It’s over.” I smile at her so she knows it’s going to be okay, stepping under the spray and letting his blood wash from my body.
“Matthew did this to you?” She gathers my clothes from the floor.
“I need to put the gun back in the cabinet; there's blood on the table. He’ll be mad about that,” I tell her, standing still and letting the water warm my skin.
“Erin, where is Matthew now?” she asks with a quiver in her voice.
“He’s gone.” I smile.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
LUKE
“You need to get the fuck outta here,” I yell at Liza when I see her and Koben sitting in the waiting room.
“Luke, no one's telling me anything. Please, I need to know if she’s okay.”
“You fuckin’ caused this.” I point my finger at her, and when Koben leaps to her defense, I slam him into the vending machine and wrap my hands around his throat.
“I don’t know what the fuck you two have going on, but you need to get the fuck away from my girl.”
“She ain’t gonna leave till she knows her friend’s okay,” he tells me, and when I follow his eyes across to Liza, I see how broken she is. Slowlyreleasing him from my grip, I take pity on her and tell her what I know.
“She’s got some swelling on her brain. The docs are keeping her out of it until the swellin’ goes down.” I clench my back teeth as I explain.
“And the baby?” she asks, closing her eyes as if the question terrifies her.
“The baby’s fine,” I tell her, watching her shoulders sag with relief. “Luke, I swear what happened was an accident. I would never hurt her,” she assures me.
