Page 82 of Paradise in Progress
“Ken, I think in some weird way, Tristan wasn’t trying to hurt you. Yes, he didn’t tell you that you would be leaving, and I know that blindsided you, but we saw how the two of you were. Each time you FaceTimed us, there were stars in your eyes, a glow that wasn’t there before.”
“It was the sun,” I murmur.
Zoe nudges me in the ribs with her elbow. Her expression tells me she’s not buying that for a second.
“No, I’ve been on vacation with you many times, and I know that wasn’t the case. That was the Tristan Nelson effect.”
“And I saw that same look on his face when he’d call in for work meetings,” Zoe adds.
“Ken, you’re my best friend, and I will always fight for you and whatever makes you happy. And while Tristan isn’t my favorite right now because he hurt you, I also saw him bring out fun Kennedy. The girl who wasn’t afraid to let her hair down and leave work in the office.”
“That’s true. You definitely seemed more at ease around him.”
“So what do you think I should do?” Tears well in my eyes, my throat clogging with emotions. “Simply forgive and forget. I’m not wired that way. I wish I were. It’d make life a lot easier, but I carry shit. I pack it up in bins and store it forever.”
“I don’t think that’s what Lana is saying.” Zoe turns to Lana, who nods in agreement. “But I think she’s saying you should give him a chance to explain himself. Maybe there’s a perfectly good reason why he let the news blindside you. Maybe he was scared of you turning against him.”
“Which happened anyway.”
Zoe shrugs. “Do you still love him?”
Turning my attention back to the movie, I think about her question. I don’t believe love can simply be turned on and off with a flip of a switch. Love is complex and multidimensional. While it takes layers to build and to fall in love, one swing of a wrecking ball can shatter the love that you know. And while I feel like I was hit with a wrecking ball, there are still pieces of those layers stuck together.
“I think she found her answer,” Lana says as she sips from her wineglass.
“We don’t need you to tell us; the important thing is that you know. Now you need to decide how you are going to handle tomorrow. Are you going to put up a professional front? Or give him a chance to explain himself?”
“What if…what if I choose to be professional?”
“Then that’s your decision. Take the time to continue healing, but establish boundaries from the beginning. Make him see that you’re not ready to discuss what happened in St. Lucia, but you are ready to continue your working relationship.”
“Is that what you guys think I should do?”
“Honey, we’re here to pick you up, and tell you how wonderful you are, but we can’t make that decision for you.” Zoe stretches her arms over my shoulders before pulling me in tight.
“I think you need to do whatever is best for you right now,” Lana adds, offering me a reassuring smile. “But if your heart is giving you any indication that there’s something still brewing between you and Tristan, I think you need to listen to it.”
Half-eaten boxes of food gather on the coffee table with empty glasses of wine as we finish watching the movie. As much as I love the romance between Kat and Patrick, my mind is busy spinning around all the scenarios for tomorrow.
Deep down, I know they’re both right. Too bad my heart and my mind won’t get on the same page.
Turns out, tomorrow is going to be more difficult than I imagined.
Do I give him one last chance?
Or do I establish a professional relationship with a man I love deeply?
Chapter thirty-four
Tristan
It’s been a weekwithout her.
Without her addicting smile.
Without her hypnotizing eyes.
Without her captivating touch.
