Page 74 of Heartless Heathens
It wasn’t a huge difference in size, but I took advantage of it when I could or when the occasion demanded it. The line of Sonny’s jaw hardened, and I could practically hear his teeth squeaking as the bone ground on itself.
“This could have gone wrong in so many ways dude.” Felix took a softer tone but I turned my cheek the other way.
I was tired of being treated like a child.
People who werenormal, loved to do that to anyone who didn’t function on the same level as them. But I couldn’t resent my brothers for worrying.
At the end of the day, I just didn’t have the spoons for it anymore.
It might not have been the brightest idea, but then again, ithadn’tbeen my idea.
She didn’t fucking know any better though.
So they didn’t need to know.
“I get it man. It could have been bad. I don’t know what I was thinking. Won’t happen again.” I looked between the two of them, Sonny crossed his arms and narrowed his gaze my way but peered behind me every few seconds to focus on Romina.
Felix and Sonny communicated silently before turning on their heels and padding down the staircase. I walked over to the girl, still hunched over in a far corner and fearful. I extended my hand in front of her. She looked up at me, blinking a few times before reaching up with both hands to wrap around my arm.
“You lied to them,” she whispered and I winked back at her with a crooked smirk.
“Sometimes the truth does more harm than good. You know?”
The smile reached her eyes, narrowing them and making her look much sweeter than that raven silverish hair allowed for. There was something about the dark-haired girls, no matter how sweet they painted themselves out to be, they always tended to dive head first into oblivion, when presented with the opportunity.
As if the call of the void was simply too loud to ignore, too magnetizing to not plunge deep inside of the madness and claim it for their own. Romina wore sheep’s clothing, but there was a wolf inside her too.
She just didn’t know it yet.
Iwokeupwitha loud gasp, the drowning part of the dream again. I had started to realize it wasn’t multiple dreams, just one long one. It played out like a story and some nights I only watched different pieces of it, almost seeming episodic. No matter how hard I tried to think of anything else before bed, it was always the same. I reached down feeling the sticky liquid between my legs and the ache in my back told me my monthly visitor had come. I groaned, and then froze once I remembered where I was.
“Oh, shit.” Felix looked down at his bed and I scurried off in a panic.
“I’m so sorry,” I shouted, frantically attempting to pull the blood soaked sheets off the bed in a bout of fear.
I had gotten really good at tracking the exact time it always came so that Father Frollo would know to bring me provisions ahead of schedule. He’d come with a couple months worth of disposable diapers and they would last me until they ran out, forcing me to fumble about asking him again. ‘The horrors of the female body,' he called it, anytime I inconvenienced him.
“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay.” He waved his hands at me like he was trying to calm down a bear, but I’d destroyed his bed completely and shame was ravaging me from the inside out.
“I’m sorry,” I said again, this time not able to stop the tears that came out of me.
He raised his arms up and I flinched, waiting for the pain of the strike to hit me for this careless mistake. Instead, his hands cupped my shoulders, and I gasped out a stuttered breath when I opened my eyes to see him gazing at me with concern.
“It’s okay.” He reassured me again. “Do you need… things?” he asked and I nodded.
He pulled out his phone and his thumb moved at lightning speed before he pocketed it again.
“Do you want to take a bath? It might help you feel better.” he asked in a hushed tone like he was trying to be as gentle as possible.
I nodded again, clutching the soiled sheets to my body in shame.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, and he pulled me into his embrace, kissing the top of my head.
“He really did a number on you, huh?” he asked.
Felix turned away my help when I offered to try to clean his bed, and instead he filled the tub for me with hot water. I sank down, feeling my back and stomach loosen from the burning pain that plagued me every month. The water eventually grew tepid, and my skin pruned.
Then there was a knock on the door.
