Page 81 of How to Get Revenge on a Cheating Ex
Last night I left his house like a raving lunatic because that kiss was so hot it broke my brain.
I shoot him a quick look, trying to tell him without words that I didn’t tell Janie about the kiss. But Janie beats me to it by oversharing on my behalf, as she’s prone to do.
“She had the panic attack to end all panic attacks last night,” Janie says.
The air rushes from my lungs.Thanks, Janie.
I swear I can feel Zack’s eyes on me, and I pick up my pace like I can outrun his concern and the humiliation this conversation brings up.
I’m not exactly proud of the fact that I’m a neurotic anxious mess. But it’s not like Zack doesn’t know me or my mental healthissues. And Janieknowsthat he knows, so apparently that means it’s fine to discuss.
“Seriously, dude,” Janie says to Zack as I speed walk ahead of them. “You should’ve seen her. It was bad. Like, epically bad. I thought I was gonna have to take her to the hospital or something.”
Thanks to my speed walking, we’re already at the end of the line and there’s nowhere for me to run. Janie’s still talking to Zack, but his attention is entirely on me.
I know he’s piecing it all together. The way I’d freaked after we’d kissed. The way I’d run out of there.
The way I was so happy this morning.
He’s confused. And he probably should be. I tug my hair out of my ponytail and run my hands through my hair, more to give myself something to do than in any real attempt to look good.
If I’d known we were sticking around for a concert I would’ve packed a change of clothes. But instead, I’ll be sporting my work uniform of a polo shirt and a pleated skirt to a rock concert, and trying not to freeze my butt off when the sun goes down.
I’m not really paying much attention to Janie and Zack.
I am back to being good, dang it. I refuse to let anyone bring me down today. And I really,reallydon’t feel like chatting about last night’s descent into hell.
I’m not exaggerating. Panic attacks are pretty much hell on earth, in my opinion, and I’m more than happy to leave it in the past.
But Janie and Zack are watching me, and I’m shuffling forward, wishing this line would go a whole lot faster.
“What up, bitches?” Janie’s best friend Alexandra shouts at us from the parking lot.
The tall girl with her spiky black hair is with a few of Janie’s other friends. When they reach us, Janie gets caught up in a conversation about people and places I know nothing about.
Zack moves forward to stand next to me, and now we’re basically alone. “So, last night...”
I bite my lip. I so don’t want to talk about last night.
I mean, I do. I know weshould.We avoided the topic all morning when he’d driven me to work. But I still have no idea what to say about last night. Not about the way he made me feel, or the fact that it’sZackwho made me feel that way.
I’d been making out with Grayson foryearswithout ever once feeling anything close to that raging inferno that Zack had managed to bring out in me with one heated kiss.
So no. I’m not sure what to say.
Zack doesn’t seem all that certain, either, because he’s shifting uncomfortably beside me, painfully silent.
Which would be kinda funny if I wasn't so uncomfortable too.
So…here we are, the two newest residents in the world of awkward.
Finally, with a sharp exhale, he turns to face me. “Did I make you have a panic attack?”
My lips part in surprise. Is that what he’s worried about? I shake my head without even having to think. “No.” But that’s not quite right. “I mean, yes. Sort of. But not likethat.”
His brows hitch up slightly at that lame response.
I take a deep breath and try again as we follow the people in line ahead of us. “Maybe a little, but mainly I think it was just an accumulation of...stuff.” I wince at my own ineloquence.
