Page 40 of Search My Soul
“Why are you threatening me? Duke is the one who said you were thirsty over her. I mean, he wasn’t wrong because you did steal her?—”
“Murk, what the fuck? Did the liquor turn you into a rat?” Soul fumed as I sat there confused. Clearly there was some information I wasn’t privy to, and Soul didn’t want me to know about it either.
“I ain’t no rat, I was just saying?—”
“You’ve said enough. Now sit your drunk ass back and enjoy the ride before you end up in a ditch somewhere,” Soul threatened. My eyes were trained on him as I wondered what was going on. Instead of stressing about it, I sat back in my seat and responded to some of the messages on my phone. Tone called me twice today before he finally settled for a text message. I scoffed when I read the contents of the message.
Dickhead T:
Why are you playing with me? I’ve been trying to come see you, but you’ve been giving me the run around. What’s up?
Sometimes when you talked to a man, it seemed as if they only heard the parts that benefited them. The last time we spoke, I made my intentions clear, but you would have thought I never said anything. Furthermore, I found it funny that he wanted to make things official after his baby mama announced her third pregnancy. Before then, he never even hinted at wanting to be in a relationship. Men could be so clueless.
“What are you over there frowning about? I know damn well you aren’t texting another nigga in my whip.” Soul’s smooth voice interrupted my thoughts.
“What difference would it make if I were? We’re not together, and the last time I checked, I’m the only person paying this phone bill.” I sassed, enjoying the annoyed expression on his handsome face.
“You gon’ make me fuck you up,” he grumbled.
“I’m not worried. If my daddy didn’t teach me anything else, he taught me how to fight and how to shoot.” I shrugged while sending a message in the group chat to let them know I was okay. My head fell back against the headrest as I stared out of the window. Lately, life was throwing all types of curveballs my way, and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could take it. I’m not sure who I pissed off in the universe, but I needed to figure out how to make things right.
After we dropped off Murk and Duke, the car fell silent. I was anxious to get home, even though there would be no rest for me. Between the money and now my car, a plan was needed. A part of me considered telling Normandee because she was good at solving other people’s problems. I needed some type of guidance and direction right now.
“You good?” he asked, this time with a softer tone.
“If I say yes, will you leave it alone?”
“If it’s the truth.” My head whipped in his direction.
“You don’t have to pretend to care in order to fuck me. You do know that, right?” I’d never been one to beat around the bush, and it irritated me when people pretended to care just to get what they wanted.
Soul responded with a low chuckle, but nothing else was said. His lack of response made me uneasy, and I questioned whether I was right about him all along. My attitude took over as I shifted my body in the seat with my back to him. Being around him brought out emotions I wasn’t used to, and it annoyed me. This was never supposed to be more than a one-time hookup.
When we finally pulled up to my place, I attempted to hop out of the truck, but the doors were locked. Immediately, I whipped around to see Soul with a blank expression on his face. No words were spoken as he pulled the handle and let himself out of the car. My stomach twisted in knots as my nerves got the best of me. He opened my door and then stepped back to allow me to get out. I reached down to grab my bag off the floor before I stepped out. He closed the door behind me, which brought him even closer. His jaw flexed as he stood there observing me. He chuckled once more without saying anything.
We stood there in silence for a moment until I watched him reach down to pick up his phone. When I heard his phone ringing, I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. A female’s voice came through on the other end, pissing me clean off.
“Hey. I wasn’t expecting your call. What’s up?”
“Aye, I’m tryna fuck. If I send you the addy, can you meet me somewhere?” His tone was even with no discernible emotion. I peered at him as if he’d lost his damn mind. I remembered Puma mentioned Murk had done something similar, and I told her she should have cussed his ass out.
“Let me put some clothes on, and I can be there whenever you need me,” she answered with no hesitation.
“Aight, bet. I’ll hit you up in a little bit.” He disconnected the line without any more conversation with her. I thought he was done until the phone rang again. I stood there as he called five different women and simply requested to fuck. No pleasantries. No sweet talk or anything.
“You sound like you’ve had a rough day. My kids are asleep, so I can have my oldest keep an eye on them so I can come take care of you.” The last girl purred into the phone. Desperation dripped from her lips. He hung up with the same promise to hit her up later. At that point, I was angry and ready to spazz out. Iattempted to move away from him, but Soul pushed me against his truck. My chest heaved up and down as I struggled to get my emotions together.
“What the fuck is your problem?” I seethed, giving him a deadly glare. Soul remained calm, and it only angered me more.
“I’m trying my best to keep my composure, but you’ve got me all the way fucked up. Now, what did you learn from that?” he probed, holding his phone up. My arms were folded across my chest as my nostrils flared.
“That you’re a hoe like I thought,” I spat with venom on my tongue.
“You seem really bothered for someone who keeps acting like you don’t want anything to do with me.”
“I’m not acting.” This time, he laughed in my face.
“Then why is your face twisted up like this?” Soul stepped closer, gripping my chin in his hand. We were so close, I wondered if he could hear the beating of my heart.
