Page 99 of Search My Soul
“I love you, too, but he can’t tell your ass when you need to sit down.”
“I think you’re being a little dramatic but I’mma let you make it. I can’t wait until this little boy gets here so I can drop his spoiled tail right off to your house.” I rolled my eyes as she smiled brightly.
“Bring him. I can’t wait to love on him and sniff him. I can’t believe you’re about to be somebody’s mommy.” I rubbed my belly because my little man was kicking like crazy.
“I can’t either, but I’ve never been so excited in my life. I’m nervous, but I know when I get to hold him everything will be worth it.” My nerves were growing the further along I became. His room was finished and completely stocked, but it still didn’t seem real yet.
“Motherhood is by far the scariest role I’ve ever taken on, but it’s so rewarding. I wake up every single day exhausted yet grateful. I never thought it was something I wanted or would even be good at. I will say Murk has played a major role in my journey. When he sees I’m struggling, he immediately jumps into action. It helps when you lean on your village in the moments when things get too overwhelming for you. My little princess is the greatest gift I never knew I needed, and I wouldn’ttrade it for the world. You’re gonna experience this same love soon and all of your doubts will be calmed.” My mind drifted off to Soul. He had taken care of all of our child’s needs so far, but I wondered how we would transition when the baby actually got here.
“Both you and Normandee are blessed to have men in your life who love you and your children. I love my father, but he was never the kind of father I would have wanted. I see the way Murk and Tycen love on y’all, and it reminds me that I never saw an example of healthy love. A part of me feels guilty because I can’t give my son the life I wanted for him.”
“That isn’t necessarily true. You and Soul may not be together, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be active. I hear the way he talks about you and his son. Even with all that the two of you have been through, the love he has for you is still there. Now the two of you may not be able to be together in the traditional sense, but don’t count him out. I truly believe in my heart that he will show up for you. Don’t count him out just yet.” My eyebrow raised as I stared at my best friend.
“When did you become president of the Soul Taylor fan club?”
“Don’t you start. I promise it isn’t like that at all. It’s just that I’ve seen a change in him over the past few months. He isn’t the same hotheaded Soul I’ve grown accustomed to.”
I listened to her words praying they were true. I knew nothing about motherhood so it would be nice to have him in my corner. I guess only time would tell. We said our goodbyes and then headed to our separate cars. I started to think that I might take a shower instead because I wanted to get in my bed quicker. Tomorrow would be another busy day, and I wanted to get as much rest as I could.
“Don’t forget to call me as soon as you get home, heffa!” Puma yelled from her car.
“Girl, you have my location. Even if I forget, it’s not like you can’t check it yourself,” I shot back.
“Just play with me. I better have a text in my phone or I’m coming over there with my belt.”
“I’ll see what I can do.” I snickered when she threw up her middle finger. My girls were my rock, and I was grateful for a solid friendship. Over the years, we’ve overcome so much, and it felt like things were finally falling into place for all of us. Watching my friends flourish in their roles as mothers and wives gave me hope for my own future, although I wasn’t in a rush for the marriage part.
“Damn it.” I hissed when I realized I left my phone in the shop. I must have left it in my smock pocket. I was taking pictures to upload to my website and must have left my phone on the front desk. I could hear Puma’s mouth now fussing at me about leaving my phone, so I had to go back for it.
“All right, I’m gonna run in here, grab my phone, and then I can go home.” I gave myself a pep talk because I wasn’t in the mood to go back in there. However, I knew the consequences if I didn’t. It only took me two minutes to get inside the shop and locate my phone. I smirked when I saw a message from Soul asking why I was still at the shop.
Me:
I’m on my way home. I accidentally left my phone.
Baby daddy:
Alright bet. What are you eating for dinner?
I stared at the message for a moment. It wasn’t unusual for him to check to make sure I’d eaten throughout the day. He’d ordered food for me on multiple occasions. I guess it made me think about what Puma and I were talking about.
Me:
I hadn’t thought much about it. The only thing on my mind is a shower and my bed.
Soul:
Patience cooked so she’s gonna be bringing you a plate. Feed my fucking son before you get in that bed.
Me:
Yes Sir.
Soul:
I’ll let her know to head your way. I’ll check in tomorrow.
Me:
