Page 16 of Bones
I glanced down at my hands to avoid looking into those deep brown wells of pleading emotion. I expected to see the blood and gore and vomit still staining my hands, but they’d been wiped clean. I wore a skimpy shirt with a plunging neckline that highlighted the brand on my chest in a way that made my skin crawl. My fingers twitched with the urge to cover the awful mark, and I twisted them together to keep from revealing that weakness.
“Bones?”
“Trey.” Clarity came up behind him, touching his shoulder. “I think you should go.”
“I’m not just leaving her here?—”
“Just go wait outside, ok? We’ll be down before the bell.”
They stared at each other for a moment, conversing with only their eyes. Finally, Trey sighed and strode out of the room. Clarity approached, the side of the thin mattress dipping as she perched on the edge of the bed.
“That was a horrible thing Madame made you do,” she said.
“Is he dead?” I mumbled.
She hesitated a moment, and I knew the answer before she gave it. “Yes.”
I finally looked up. Her brown eyes looked like Trey’s, but her skin was darker, more bronzed than tan. Up close I could see the healing bruises on her too-thin face and arms. I could guess where we were. I’d been in enough brothels to recognize this as one. I struggled to sit up, relieved when she didn’t move to help me. I leaned back against the cool rough wall, my eyes drifting around her room without actually seeing it.
I couldn’t get the sound of Hojo’s screams out of my head. Juck had been endlessly cruel and tortured countless people, including me, but he’d never used me to torture anyone else. I closed my eyes, furious at myself for not seeing this possibility. Yes, he’d called me his secret weapon, but I’d never thought of myself as an actual weapon before. I’d never had my healing twisted and abused like that before.
One of the first things Juck ever told me was that if people knew what I could do they would hurt me and use me. My stomach churned. I fucking hated it when he was right.
Clarity cleared her throat delicately, and I came back to the red silk room with a pained start.
“Trey and Mac brought you here last night. You were unconscious. I cleaned you up as best I could.”
I watched her eyes flicker to where the “J” burned into my chest, and my fingers twitched again with the urge to cover it up.
“I am not a healer,” she continued. “You were not injured that I could see, but you were burning up with a fever. I wasn’t sure what to do, but Trey and I stayed with you all night. We tried to cool you down with cold washcloths, and your fever finally broke this morning around dawn.”
She paused and then reached out and placed a gentle hand over mine. “Are you ok?”
No.I wanted to say.No, I was not ok.
You gotta be stronger. You hear? Be stronger.Wolf’s voice echoed in my head.
“I’ll be fine,” I lied, pulling my hand free.
Her eyes looked sad as though she could see everything I wasn’t saying. “My name is Clarity. I don’t blame you for not trusting us, but therearegood people here.” She paused. “Mac and Trey are good people.”
I couldn’t resist the sneer that crossed my face, but I stayed silent. After a moment of studying my face, she sighed.
“How do you feel then?” she asked, her voice brisker. “Does anything hurt?”
I paused. My entire body ached like I’d received a beating. That warm kernel of power in my chest felt small and weak. My hands still shook, and nausea turned my stomach, but I wasn’t about to tell her any of that.
“I’ll be fine,” I repeated.
Clarity’s eyes narrowed on my face, and I had to look away. Her eyes looked so similar to Trey’s.
“Trey said you’re to report to the clinic as soon as you’re able. Would you like a bath before you go?”
A bath? I peered up at her in surprise, and she smiled.
“One of my johns gifted it to me. We don’t have hot water, but you can get yourself clean.”
“That’d be nice,” I said.
