Page 164 of Fangs
My stomach tied itself in a knot as we approached the pine trees surrounding the Pit. I hadn’t been here since the night I jumped in the Pit with Brimstone, and it was affecting me more than I’d expected. When we stepped through the trees, I came to an abrupt halt. The Pit was gone entirely…filled in and leveled out. In the middle of the area was a bonfire. Nemo and Smith and several other people were standing around it, admiring their work. The area around the fire pit had many log benches for seating and lanterns hung on poles.
It looked lovely and peaceful—as if the brutal murders that occurred here were nothing more than a bad dream.
My fingernails bit into the palms of my hands as I stared at the fire pit, remembering the horrible crack when Brimstone snapped that man’s neck like a twig, Sky’s freezing fingers clutching my shirt, the terror she exuded, the realization that I was dying as Brimstone’s hands squeezed my throat?—
“You makin’ escape plans, or are you actually stickin’ around for once?” Kai asked as he passed, and I forced my feet to move.
No one else seemed bothered, but I scanned the group for Sky and wasn’t surprised when I didn’t see her. I wondered if anyone else here had ever seen one of the sentencings. From what I gathered, most decent people said their goodbyes to those sentenced beforehand and didn’t attend the event.
I sat on one of the logs beside Wolf and rubbed my arms. Nemo and a few others had pulled out some musical instruments and played them quietly from a corner. Apple bounced between us and the other kids as they played hide and seek.
I wondered if we were sitting near where I’d lain in the Pit in the freezing rain and waited to die. I rubbed my arms again.
“Here.”
I jumped. Wolf stood before me, offering a mug of steaming liquid. I took it, frowning.
“What’s this?”
“Peppermint tea.” Wolf returned to his seat beside me and gestured to where Neena and Neka were pouring steaming water into mugs for people. “You keep rubbin’ your arms, so I figured you were cold.”
I wasn’t really, and I hadn’t even noticed I’d been doing that. I forced a smile. “Thanks.”
He tilted his head and looked more closely at me, but to my relief, Scar plopped on the seat beside my brother and started talking. I sipped my tea and scanned the area. Lee and Tuck were talking to a group of the remaining loggers; the kids were still running around shrieking and laughing, and Sable and Kai were snuggled together on a bench.
I meant to look away, but I watched, transfixed, as Sable tugged Kai closer by his jacket collar and kissed him. Kai smiled against his lips and tilted his head, his hands tunneling into Sable’s long hair. Kai broke their kiss to say something that made Sable laugh, and then Kai kissed him again even harder.
Grief swept over me like a wave.
I just wanted Trey. I wanted him here. Gods, I wanted him here so fiercely it was a physical ache in my chest. I didn’t care about the letter. I didn’t care about any of the things I’d been angry about.
I made myself finish my tea before I stood. “I think I’m gonna head out.”
Wolf’s lips pressed into a thin line.
“You sure?” Scar asked, her head tilting.
“Yeah, I’m tired.” I pasted a smile on my face.
“You want me to walk—” Wolf started in a low voice.
“No, it’s okay,” I interrupted, my fingers twitching. I hoped I didn’t sound as desperate as I felt. “I’ll be fine by myself. It’s a nice walk.”
He opened his mouth like he was about to argue, but Scar gently nudged his leg. He glanced at her and then back at me, and his expression shuttered. “Okay, well, we won’t stay out long.”
I ducked my head and hurried back down the path. I hated that I was proving Kai right. I hated the disappointment in Wolf’s eyes. I hated that I felt guilty for leaving without telling Lee. I hated that I couldn’t stop caring what they thought of me.
It was a long walk back to the clinic, and I wasn’t surprised when my feet veered off the path home and brought me to the cemetery. It was quiet over here, but I could still hear the kids laughing and the faint sound of the music. I stood next to Trey’s grave and wrapped my arms around myself, but my eyes remained painfully dry. My memories of the Pit were impossible to separate from Trey—his rage interlaced with gentleness as he carried me home, the raw honesty cracking through his voice, the entire world falling away when the soft curve of his lips met mine.
When the world ended, humanity didn’t. I often longed for the Before I read about in books, but some people had to wake up the morning after the world’s end, get out of bed, and continue living. How did they find the strength to survive with the knowledge of precisely what they’d lost?
I tried again to feelsomething,any little bit of his spirit, but nothing came. My shoulders slumped, and my entire body felt so heavy. I wished I could sink into the dirt?—
A sound from behind me made me spin around just in time to see a person step out of the darkness. They strode toward me, and I froze, my eyes locked on the dark silhouette.
“It’s just me, Tuck,” a deep voice said.
Relief surged through me, making me dizzy, but on its heels came anger. I glared at him as he stopped at my side.
