Page 80 of Things I Overshared

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“You know my brother is the stubborn, silent type. The only way I ever talk to him is through text. Have you tried that?”

“Text him what?Hey, you’re being an idiot, and I want to jump your bones!”

She laughs. “No, just chat with him, get him talking. Maybe he’ll tell you what, exactly, is shoved so far up his ass, and why.”

“Hmmm.” I stare at her, because she might be a genius. Skye and her introvert bestie Janie prefer texting over any and all other forms of communication.

“Then, after you’ve got him warmed up, maybe slip in a little naked pic, you know,Whoopsie, now we’re sexting, don’t know how it happened!” she singsongs, and we laugh, but the thought makes my stomach flip. I don’t tell her I’ll never commit to another digitally immortalized sexual photo or video or even audio, ever again. But normal texting? Now, texting I can do.

I hop in Charlie’s car after hugging Trina goodbye and decide to give it a try.

Me: You know, friends don’t avoid each other for two days straight.

What gives?

Emerson: I’ve no idea what you’re talking about

Uh-huh.

I’m starting to get a little concerned about what all goes on in your room

Is there a circus in there?

Do you have an OnlyFans where you get on and let people watch you edit spreadsheets?

Oh! A secret wardrobe to Narnia?

Yes, I’m in Narnia. Where are you?

Headed home now.

Went to dinner with Trina.

What did you eat?

I had some of your leftover pasta. It was delicious.

I told you I can cook! What’s your favorite meal?

Shepherd’s pie, probably.

OMG that’s such a British answer!

Oh, what’s yours, America’s Sweetheart, a Big Mac?

Rude.

It’s pizza, Hideaway from back home, but if you tell anyone that, I’ll deny it and say BBQ.

What’s your favorite color? It can’t actually be yellow.

It is.

Aren’t you going to ask mine?

I already know yours. Magenta.

Lucky guess.