Page 72 of Never Tell Secrets
But it wasn’t all better. Our peace still lay in pieces at our feet and I had no idea how to mend it again. I pulled away, backing into my room but he didn’t release my hand.
“Lo, do I have any chance? Could you ever trust me again?” His eyes were full of such earnest longing. A part of me wished I could say yes and fling myself into his arms but I couldn’t. He deserved my honesty.
“I’m working on it.” That was the best I could do for now. I’d said those words to him before and the look in his eyes told me he was lost in those same memories. My chest aching, I slipped my hand out of his. “Goodnight, Alfie,” I whispered, mystomach clenching, my senses screaming at me as I left him in the darkened hallway, alone.
“Goodnight, Lo.”
Twenty-Four
Iawoke in bed linens so light I felt like I was sleeping on a cloud. That was the first sign I wasn’t in my own bed. My eyes drifted open and the first thing I saw were my framed Evergarden sketches on the wall. I had been so hopeful when I had created those, so excited for our future. So naive about the kind of man Alfie truly was.
I stretched and eased out of bed. I noticed an envelope that looked like it had been pushed under the door. I opened it and sure enough, inside was a message from Alfie.
Lo,
I’ve been called away on business so will be unable to have breakfast with you this morning. Please make yourself at home and feel free to stay as long as you like.
Elliot will drive you home when you’re ready.
I hope these will make up for my absence.
A.
What was he talking about? I unlocked the door and my heart swelled as I discovered what was on the other side. I knelt, running my fingers over the delicate petals of the bleeding hearts. Except that these weren’t pink like the ones he used to send me, they were a deep red, representing not only the romance and passion of the pink hearts, but power and strength too. He was telling me to be strong. The thing was, I was already strong, and sometimes I thought it was that very strength that wanted me away from him.
I ran my fingers over the silken velvet of the petals, wondering whether it would take more strength to take Alfie back, or let him go for good.
“He’s really pulling out all the stops, huh?” Keira’s voice startled me. I turned to find her eyeing the vase of bleeding hearts as I arranged them on the window ledge in our living room.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I gave them a final tweak and straightened to face her. “I haven’t seen much of you this week.”
She’d only gotten home a few hours ago, looking her usual dishevelled self after a night out. Now, she was showered and dressed again, looking deadly in a little black dress and heels so high they must be giving her vertigo.
“I’ve been busy.” She shrugged. “Work.”
“Right…” I trailed off, wondering when things had gotten so awkward between us. I eyed my best friend. She held herself as she always did, like a woman confident in her sensuality, but there was a distraction behind her eyes. Something was gnawing on her, a poisonous parrot whispering in her ear. “Keira, is something going on with you? You haven’t been right since we went to the club.”Since you met Damien. I didn’t want to saythat part out loud, the phrase‘don’t poke the bear’ springing to mind.
“I’m fine, Lo. Just work, like I said.”Bullshit, I thought but instead of calling her on it, I decided to let it be for now. She turned to head out the door but paused. I waited as she hovered, biting her lip before she finally spoke. “When you first met Alfie, what was it like?”
I stared at her, surprised by her question. “It was like getting punched in the face, kicked in the stomach and set on fire, in the best, most terrifying way. Why?”
She looked pensive, her dark eyes darker than usual. She cleared them, giving me a shrug full of faux nonchalance. “Just making sure I know what to stay clear of.”
What was going on with her? “I wouldn’t change it, you know. All the pain, the damage, I’d do it all over again.”
“Why?” she asked, looking at me like I was insane. Maybe I was.
“A connection like that, it’s rare. I’m glad I got to experience it. Even if we didn’t get a happy ending, I’m glad I was brave enough to try.” I looked at my friend, wishing she would tell me what was wrong, but Keira couldn’t be pushed, she had always been a person that had to do things in her own time. “Hey, do you wanna watch an old film with me? Eat ice cream? We haven’t had girl time in a while.”
She looked like she was going to say yes, until her phone buzzed in her bag. She pulled it out, her expression freezing when she read the caller ID. I frowned as she swiped her thumb across the screen, rejecting the call. She cleared her face, forcing a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “I’m going out.”
“Maybe you should take the night off.”
“I just need to blow off steam,” she said, a sharp edge in her voice as she turned to go. “I’m good, Lola. Don’t worry about me.”
I watched her disappear out the front door. I chewed my lip. Something was bothering my best friend and I didn’t like it.
The next day, after finishing mundane paperwork for Imani, I left her lost in her latest design and headed for my favourite spot in the Arboretum. Nestled in the safety of the giant Redwood and the midday autumn sun, I sank into my own project. I was just getting into a rhythm when my phone rang. My stomach flipped over when I saw Alfie’s name flashing on the screen.
