Page 90 of Never Tell Secrets
“No. I want to know if you hurt her.” I regretted the words as soon as they were out of my mouth. Damien’s expression darkened, all levity gone.
“No, Lola. I didn’t hurt her.” He sat forward, his eyes stony. “I don’t hurt women. Not like that.”
“I’m sorry—” I started but he waved a hand at me, cutting me off.
“It’s okay, you’re just ignorant about our lifestyle. I get it.” His expression softened a little as he studied me. “You know, I believe that an ignorant mind can be forgiven if it's open to an education. Are you open to an education, Lola?”
I swallowed, thinking of all the debauched things that went on down here. Things I couldn’t even begin to imagine. Things I wouldn’t want to explore with anyone, except maybe one person. “It depends who’s doing the educating.”
“Right answer.” He sat back in his chair, all awkwardness gone.
“Why do I get the feeling that you were just testing my loyalty to Alfie?”
“Because I was.” He held my gaze, not a hint of shame there. I bit my lip, unsure whether to be annoyed with him or not.
“Does that also explain why Kal keeps teasing me?”
“It explains why Kal let you down here at all.” His dark eyes studied my face and for the first time I saw something besides the cocky playboy. “We all want to make sure you’re the right fit for Alfie and this place is a pretty good judge of character.”
I was tempted to argue that it should probably be up to Alfie, not them, but I couldn’t begrudge them their protectiveness. I knew Alfie had been dealing with circling sharks his whole life and I had no doubt they probably had too.
“Fair enough, throw all the tests at me you want but let me just be clear, Alfie and I aren’t a sure thing. We’re just figuring shit out, but I promise not to hurt him intentionally.”
“Fine,” he nodded, though he didn’t seem convinced, either about my promise or my declaration that Alfie and I weren’t an item. “As for your friend, anything I did to her, she asked for.”
I bit my lip, unsure where to go from here. It felt wrong to be poking in his brain about Keira but my worry for her pushed me forward. “So, nothing bad happened?”
“Look,” he sighed, “we had a good time and when it was done I tried to give her the same aftercare I give to any other woman I play with.”
Aftercare.I’d heard the term several times now but I still wasn’t entirely sure what he meant. “What is aftercare, exactly?”
Damien’s brows raised, an incredulous expression on his handsome face. “Alfie’s really kept your training wheels on, huh?” He chuckled. I wasn’t sure whether he was laughing at my expense or Alfie’s. “He should be the one to explain all this to you but the short version is I’m dominant when I fuck, it’s my job to check in with my partner afterwards to make sure that she or he is mentally and physically okay. Sometimes I bathe them, hold them, feed them, whatever. Depends on the person.”
I nodded, trying to wrap my head around what he was telling me. “Dominant as in ‘A Dominant’?”
Damien’s smile grew wider at my question. “So, you’re not a total novice then?”
“I’ve read some stuff.” I shrugged like it was no big deal, though I could feel my cheeks blushing bright red. “So, would that make Keira a submissive?” I wrinkled my nose, that term didn’t seem to fit my best friend.
“I’m not telling you that. My point is that I tried to take care of her the same way as I would anyone else. She gave me the brush off, alright?” He shrugged again but if I wasn't mistaken there was a hint of pain behind his eyes. Whatever was there, he shook it away, moving on. “Look, she didn’t seem like an amateur to me. She knew what she was doing, so I don’t think whatever is wrong with her has anything to do with the way we fucked. Besides, in the grand scheme of fuckery, it was nothing too dark. Just a bit bumpy, in all the right ways.” He laughed, rubbing a hand over his jaw as if replaying his memories with her.
I felt like I was dipping my toes way too much into my bestie's personal life. “Have you spoken to her since?”
“I’m not going to tell you that,” Damien said, his tone gentle but final.
“She’s my best friend.”
“And if she wants you to know, she’ll tell you herself.” He raised a hand before I could argue. “Look, I get you’re being a good friend, but I’m not going to run my mouth about Keira’s personal life.”
I stared at Damien Marx. Whatever I’d expected from this man, it hadn’t been this. He had a level of decency and respect I hadn’t seen coming. “I’m sorry, I’m just worried about her.”
He nodded, his expression softening. “It’s hard when your best friend shuts you out. Hopefully yours won’t take twelve years to let you back in again.” He gave a small laugh that did nothing to erase the pain in his words.
I felt guilty. I’d underestimated Damien, his character and his friendship with Alfie.
He straightened his shoulders, and I prepared to have a metaphorical door slammed in my face the same way Alfie had done so many times. “Now, as fun as this has been, I should be getting you back to the surface.” He slid out of the chair and headed for the door, giving me no room to argue.
I bit my lip. I was frustrated I didn't know what was wrong with my friend but relieved she hadn’t been hurt by Damien. He could be lying but I didn't think so. This man had no need to lie about what he did with women.
