Page 77 of Clawed
Whatever had gone on in that house in the last day had shaken Hannah to her core, and as two paramedics rushed into the lounge toward her, all she could think about was the face of the man who’d pushed her right to the brink.
Lawes.
Why couldn’t she get him out of her mind?
He’d said he’d find her again, but what did that mean, and how would she survive until he did?He’d need to stay away until the business with the police was concluded, and based on her prior experiences, that could take months.
Pain echoed in her chest at the suffocating fear of not seeing him for that long.
Closing her eyes, she wished Lawes had never come back into her life, wished he’d just left her alone, yet at the same time, she acknowledged the lie.She was glad he’d acted.Without him, she might never have realized what she needed to move forward wasn’t girls’ nights or online dating; it was the sensitive brutality that only came from his close attention.
She wanted to cry at the bleak conclusion.
Why did twisted deviancy have such a hot and salacious ring to it?Why couldn’t she fall for someone nice and normal like other women?
“Her blood pressure is high,” one of the paramedics told the other.“We should take her to the hospital.”
Hannah sighed.Maybe she did need to go to the hospital?Perhaps they had a world-class shrink she could speak to?Christ knew she needed one.
She rose on shaky legs and made her way to the gurney they’d laid on the floor.Following their instructions, she lay out on the stretcher, gripping the blanket around her as they hoisted her from the ground.The last time she’d been carried, it had been Lawes doing the hoisting, but he was gone, fled at her insistence, and Hannah didn’t know when, or if, she’d ever see him again.
Her brow furrowed as they carried her out into the open.He’d said he’d find her, but how could he?The only way he’d been able to track her down last time was thanks to Saul, and she’d be damned if she ever used those online dating sites again.
I shouldn’t want him to find me.She wiped her eyes with the heel of one hand.I shouldn’t want any of this.
But she did.
She wanted it all.
Lawes, his authority, the stark steel of his punishments, and the muted murmurs of his tenderness.She yearned for the whole package.
Lawes lit her up, helping her to feel more vivacious than she’d ever known, and it was too late to pretend otherwise.
Outside the shabby house, cold air assaulted her bare legs and feet, but she welcomed the chill.Until her captor came her way again, she needed the stark reminder of what it was to be alive.
Chapter Thirty
