Page 168 of Dove
“You want crotch goblins?” Her question was deadly serious despite the ludicrous choice of words.
“Not yet, but…maybe someday,” I admitted guardedly, as if I might be condemned just for saying it. Reverie had always been very vocal about not wanting kids, and while she got along with little children just fine in social settings, she would never be the kind of person to volunteer to hold a baby. That was probably a good thing, too, unless you wanted that baby’s first word to befuck.
“Oh, Dove.” She surprised me with a hug from behind, her arms wrapping around my shoulders unexpectedly in a tight squeeze.
“What are you doing? Stop that! I’mnotpregnant, Reverie.” I tried squirming out of her grip, afraid her weird celebratory hug might somehow invoke mother nature, or whoever it was that was in charge of baby dust. I was nowherenearready to have kids.I wasn’t even sure Josh wanted them, and considering how his mom had lost her life delivering him...
He might not.
“I know, I know, but… knowing I might be an auntie one day is so special! I’ll be godmother, right?” She sounded so hopeful, as if she wasn’t theonlyperson I had to ask, or the only person I would want to.
“I wouldn't choose anyone else,” I vowed sincerely.
I could see her eyes grow misty in the mirror and one thing Reverie was not was a crier. Seeing her tear up twice in one day was an anomaly and had me worriedly spinning the chair to face her.
“Okay, you’re scaring me. What’s really going on?”
She waved the hand not holding the dryer in front of her face, dismissing the fact she was getting emotional. “Nothing, nothing.”
“That reaction’s not nothing. Now it’s your turn to spill.” Just in case she needed a reminder I told her, “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
“I know that.” She put her dryer back in its holder and slumped down into the chair of the station beside me.
It took her a few moments to speak, and when she did her voice wavered, sounding so fragile it made my heart ache. “If I leave, I’ll miss everything.”
“What are you missing? Rev, nothing's happened yet. I swear I’m not pregnant!”
“I know that.” Her usually happy, cheery voice was thick with emotion. “I just mean life here in general. I know not much goes on, Iknowthat, but…ugh.”She covered her eyes with her hand. “They’ve gotten to me.”
“Who?” I was confused beyond belief with the direction this conversation had taken and slightly perturbed by her reaction.
“The old biddies of Haven.” She waved toward the door. “All the locals who’ve come in to get their hair done since I’ve been back.”
Ah, I think I was starting to understand now.
“Rev.” I tried to stop my delighted smile, but it tugged at my cheeks, muscles aching as I attempted to hold it back. “Are you maybe,possibly,oh, I don't know,enjoyingliving back in Haven again?”
Her lips quivered, as if about to answer, but then her body shuddered, and she made a face. “I can’t even say it.”
“It’s okay to like small town life, you know. City living isn’t for everyone.” I couldn’t help but poke fun at her, although inside my chest my heart soared. She didn’t have to say what I already knew.
“I loved LA,” she defended. “I still do, it just isn’t...”
“Home,” I finished for her when she trailed off.
“It doesn’t have Zeke,” she confessed in a low murmur. “Or you. Or my sister. Or the ladies that come in and get their hair done with me every damn week just to gossip. Being back here made me realize that maybe I didn’t hateeverypart of Haven, after all.”
My hand snuck out from under the cape, reaching over to grab one of hers.
“Have you talked to Zeke about how you’re feeling?”
Her hand tensed in mine. “Are you kidding me? If Zee heard me say any of that it would give him hope that I might stay. All he knows is that I’m contemplating moving to New York.” Her fingers squeezed around mine, as if in apology for what she was about to say next. “And that’s still a big possibility. This place has me all confused. I need to step back, take a moment to think about what I really want. If beinghereis what I really want. Who knows, maybe once I’m in New York it will reawaken my love for the city. You know how this town gets under people’s skin.” The last part was said jokingly, but it fell flat between us.
Because I didn’t, and I never had. Not like how she’d described it.
For Reverie, Haven made her skin crawl with the need to escape. But I always had a suspicion she was trying to outrun the demons her family had created in her. This town wasn’t to blame for that, but she had to see it for herself. Once she overcame that, I think she could be happy here. With Zeke.
I didn’t want her thinking I was trying to sway her so instead I agreed, “Maybe it will. I just want you happy, Reverie. Wherever that means you call home.”
