Page 167 of One Indian Girl
‘Brijesh, I can’t do this,’ I said.
‘What? Too hectic? Okay, we can see apartments later. It’s just that my current apartment is too small and...’
‘I am not talking about the apartment hunt.’
‘Then?’
‘This. Whatever is going on. I am sorry. I can’t do this.’
‘What? Relatives? They are getting on my nerves too. How many more feet do we have to touch?’
I held his shoulder. I turned him towards me.
‘Brijesh, I cannot get married,’ I said.
‘What?’ he said in genuine confusion. ‘Sorry, beg your pardon?’
‘You heard me.’
He looked at me and laughed.
‘What?’ I said.
‘You are so funny. Sweet also.’
He pulled my cheek.
‘Sweet?’ I said.What is so sweet about me leaving him high and dry at the altar?
‘You are nervous. And so like a little child, you are saying I can’t do this. It’s sweet only.’
‘It’s not...’ I said as he interrupted me.
‘I am scared too. I live alone. Now I will have this other person living with me for the rest of my life. It petrifies me.’
‘It does. Yes. And this is just too soon.’
‘Too soon? We have planned this for months.’
‘We planned the event for months. However, we decided so soon.’
‘You said yes. I said yes. We had to reach a decision, right?’
‘Brijesh. Can you please trust me? I can’t do this.’
He smiled again. He placed an arm around my shoulder.
‘From now on, your fears are mine, and mine are yours. So be scared or whatever, I am with you.’
I got off the bench. I turned around to face him.
‘Brijesh, I don’t think you are getting me. It is not nervousness. There’s stuff I need to deal with and my head is a huge squishy mess.’
‘I am sorry to hear that. But...’ he paused.
‘But what?’
‘But 200 people are dancing inside to celebrate us coming together. A mood swing cannot dictate our decision now.’
