Page 168 of One Indian Girl

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‘It’s not a mood swing, Brijesh.’

‘What is it then? Something you want to tell me?’

‘It’s my past. I still have to come to terms with it.’

He paused to look at me, wondering what I meant.

‘We all do. It happens over time.’

‘It’s about my future too. About what I want.’

Brijesh’s phone rang. He smiled.

‘There, the search party is out,’ he said and picked up the phone. ‘Yeah, dad. I am here, stepped out for some air. Yeah, Radhika is with me. Just chatting, dad. Okay, we are coming.’

He ended the call and turned at me.

‘The elders are leaving. They want to bless the couple before they go to bed,’ he said and smiled.

‘Sorry Brijesh, I...’

‘We have to go now. Listen, Radhika, I am no expert on women. Maybe this is how all women think the night before their wedding.’

‘Not all.’

‘Maybe in arranged marriages they do. We still don’t know each other. Can I suggest something?’

‘What?’

‘Go to your room. Rest. Please sleep. All these guests and huge celebrations are bothering you.’

‘Well, I only chose to have a grand wedding like this.’

‘Exactly. So maybe your doubts are just irrational last-minute fears. Sleep on it. You will feel better. Let’s go now,’ he said.

‘But...’ I said.

‘Dad’s calling again,’ Brijesh said as he picked up his phone.

I took my phone back from Aditi didi’s bag when I got to my room.

I checked the time. 2 a.m. I hadn’t unlocked my phone to read my messages yet. Message notifications flooded my phone home screen. They read like this:

Debu: Hey baby, what’s up?

Debu: Is there anything I can do to help? Can I talk to anyone on your side?

Debu: 5 more messages

Neel: In my room. Here if you need me.

Neel: When can we talk?

Neel: You around? Can we meet? Like for a minute?

Neel: 3 more messages

Brijesh: Hope you are fine? Get some rest, okay?

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