Page 174 of One Indian Girl
‘I get it. Women want everything. To have a lovely home and be a great mother. To also have a chance to shine in their careers,’ Neel said.
‘Not all, maybe, but for many, yes,’ I said.
‘How is it practically possible? Career means long office hours. Home means kids, responsibilities,’ Debu said.
‘Exactly! Have you thought why it’s not practical?’ I said.
‘Why?’ Debu said.
‘Because men designed this world. They decided office timings, 9 to 6, five days a week. Women weren’t in the workforce then. They are now. These office timings work well for men. They don’t work for mothers, for instance. What are we going to do about it?’
‘We as in us three?’ Debu said.
‘No, we as in the whole world,’ I said. ‘When will we say, let’s rejig this to ensure it works for women? Forget rejig, when will we even acknowledge the issue?’
I paused to catch my breath, then leaned forward as if to listen to them. Debu finished his orange juice in one quick swallow.
‘You have a point. Conceded. I didn’t realize your strong need to have a family too. That is why I made a mess last time,’ Neel said.
‘I imposed my notion of motherhood on you. Ignored your desire to have a good career alongside. But forgive me and come with me. I will support you,’ Debu said.
‘No,’ I said, my voice coming from somewhere deep within me.
‘You are making the right choice with me, Radhika,’ Neel said.
‘No, Neel, not with you either.’
‘What?’ he said.
I checked the time. It was 5.28.
‘I am not coming with you, or with you. There are fundamental things about both of you that won’t change. Debu, you say you will be supportive, but the fact that you couldn’t handle even a bit of my success means it’s an intrinsic part of you. You can’t change that. And I plan to be a lot more successful than what you saw. So, sorry, no.’
‘But Radhika...’ Debu began.
I placed a finger on my lips to shush him right there.
‘And Neel, you are amazing, no doubt. The chartered plane, tempting, of course. Now with the divorce and everything I know you love me too. But you know what, you love only half of me. My other half is Kusum, the woman you left. You want a party girl. Someone young, who allows you to cling on to your youth. The same youth you work so hard in the gym for. Well, I won’t be this young girl forever. I don’t know what Neel Gupta will do with me then. He likes Radhika, his young vice president, but will he like Radhika, the diaper-changing wife and mom?’
‘Of course, I...’
‘Shh. I am not going to compromise and settle for less. I have made up my mind. Thank you for listening. Now, no more lectures. I will simply tell you the action plan.’
‘What?’ Debu said.
‘Both of you, I need you to leave, right now. This hotel, Goa and my life. You will not bother me, my family or my guests. No messages, no calls. You are my past, but guess what, I am done with my past. So please,’ I said. I pointed to the exit.
‘But,’ Debu said.
‘I am saying fuck off in the nicest way possible. Please do appreciate that. And do fuck off,’ I said.
Debu and Neel looked at each other. They looked at me once more and stood up to leave. In silence they walked out of the restaurant. Together. Out of my life.
Brijesh entered the coffee shop just as they left. He came up to me. He wore grey workout clothes. He noticed the used crockery and cutlery on the table.
‘Good morning, wife-to-be,’ he said. ‘These people? They came to see you?’
‘Good morning, Brijesh, come. We need to talk,’ I said. He saw my serious expression and sat opposite me looking a little baffled.
