Page 104 of Loved Out Loud
“I’ve never seen him like this in all the years I’ve been on his security team.
“What was he like before?”
Dan sobers. “Darker. He had a perpetual heaviness that hung from shoulders. Even when he was so drunk and high he couldn’t walk, it never lifted. I don’t ever want to see him fall back into that pattern again.”
“Let’s hope he never goes back to that.”
“You’ve been so good for him.”
“You think so?”
“I know so.”
“Sometimes I worry that I’m just a distraction for him. Something for him to funnel his attention into instead of his addiction recovery.”
“We were all worried about that at the beginning. But we’ve been on the tour for weeks now. It’s different. He’s different in a way he wasn’t while sober before you. I think you can trust in whatever you two have going on.”
I look over at him. “You should be a therapist or something.”
He laughs, head tipped back. “My degree is actually in psychology. I was only going to do this as a summer job between undergrad and graduate school, but I liked it so much I decided to stay on.”
“So much makes sense now.” We come to the suite, and he opens the door for me. “Thank you.”
“Of course.”
Grams turns, and I know by the look in her eyes that I’m about to be teased mercilessly for the rest of the night.
“That boy is so smitten.”
“Grams.” I shake my head. “He just needed attention.”
“Oh, you didn’t see how he looked at you. We got a view right on the jumbotron.” She wraps a bony arm around my waist. “He cares about you.”
He does. That much is obvious, surprising me with the bookstore shopping spree and then flying her and my mom outto surprise me. I don’t think I could ever express my gratitude adequately.
But I’d be lying if deep inside I’m not still wondering why. We’re so different. Our lives would never have intersected had I not been asked to come on the morning show for their book club segment.
Greg’s voice rings in my head, telling me that he’s just using me for some sort of publicity. He has a reputation he needs to course correct. What better way to do so than make grand gestures and declarations about the romance author you got stuck traveling with.
No.
I’m not going to listen to him, just like I know not to listen to the voice of my father. I won't ruin everything. There are plenty of reasons to love me, not that I think that’s what is happening between us. It’s just attraction intensified by circumstances. I cling to what Darren and Dan had just shared with me, knowing Tyler’s feelings are real.
Now isn’t the time to dwell on these thoughts, though. I only have a few more hours with my mom and Grams. I don’t want to waste a second stuck in my own thoughts.
I yelp as a hand whips out and wraps around my waist, pulling me into Stone’s dressing room after the concert. The cedar scent of his body wash surrounds me as he presses me against the wall. He takes my mouth with his in a long, languid kiss that I feel all the way into my bones. It’s unhurried and deep, the complete opposite to what he gave me on stage earlier.
“Did you already say goodbye to Barb and Bev?” he asks as he breaks the kiss.
“Yeah.” Sadness washes over me. Two days wasn’t long enough. “They actually had to get back to the hotel before the performance ended, so Grams could take her meds.”
“I’m sorry I missed saying goodbye.”
“Don’t worry about it, you left a lasting impression.”
“A good one, I hope.”
I smile up at him. “Definitely good.” I run my hands down his chest all the way to the waist band of his sweatpants. “In fact, I think I should show you my appreciation.”
