Page 15 of Loved Out Loud
“Clearly.”
“If anything, I’m worried for her sanity on the bus with the three of you and Darren. At least Jade will be there, too.”
“Agreed.” I open my door and step over the threshold. “See you in a few hours.”
He walks into his room across from mine. “Later.”
When we get to the restaurant, Darren, Jade, and Hazel are already seated in a private dining room. Jade is sitting next to Hazel with Darren across from her. I hang back and let Xan and Tobias sit first. Tobias sits across from Hazel and Xan drops down beside Jade, exactly what I was hoping for. I’m at the opposite end of the table but across from Hazel, so I can still look down at her without being too obvious.
Her hair falls down her back in long dark waves that look so soft and silky they belong in a shampoo commercial. Her makeup is light aside from her bold red lips. I can’t tell what exactly she’s wearing, aside from it having long sleeves.
Jade leans over and whispers something to her which makes her laugh, and, fuck me, it’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. I want more of those. But I want them to be for me.
A server comes out with water for the table. Xan, Tobias, and I will only have water, but Darren orders a soda. The girls stick with water as well. I pick up my menu after the server leaves, but all my attention is on listening to Tobias as he asks questions, getting to know Hazel.
He never eats before a show due to having a nervous stomach. It’s something he learned the hard way early on by nearly shitting himself during one of our sets. Neither Xan nor I have that issue, but we do tend to eat lighter prior to shows.
“You’re being oddly quiet,” Darren says to me with his menu held up to give us privacy. “Are you feeling good?”
“I’m fine.” I stretch my arm over the back of his chair. “More nervous than usual not being able to throw back a couple shots before the show, but I’ll get over it once I’m on stage.”
He nods. “You’ll be fine. We’ve got you.”
“I know.”
Fuck, do I ever know it. I doubt I’d even be alive if it weren’t for the people at this table. I owe them everything. Fucking up this tour is not something I’ll permit myself to do.
“Are you coming to the show tonight, Hazel?” Xan asks after we’ve all placed our orders.
“Yes, Jade gave me my pass already. I think I’ll watch from the audience.”
“You should sit in the VIP tent.” It’s safer there. The thought of her getting injured in the crowd somehow makes me ill. “Our shows can get a bit wild.”
“I’ll be okay.” She locks eyes with me, her gray eyes holding mine until Tobias pulls her attention away.
“You’re welcome backstage, too.”
“I’ll think about it.” She gives him a smile.
My stomach churns at the thought of her getting caught in a huge crowd surge. Our shows are loud and wild; even being sober, I’ll still be encouraging the crowd to let themselves go.
I lean over to Darren. “Should we have security on her if she’s in the audience, just in case?” I ask quietly.
“I’ll look into getting one of the backups assigned to her for shows.”
She looks back and forth between the two of us as if she knows we’re discussing her. Her lips press together, but she doesn’t say a word. The food arrives, and she settles into conversation with Tobias, asking him why he’s not eating. Shelaughs at something he says, and an irrational stab of jealousy shoots through me.
I need to get a fucking grip. This is a new side of me, one I’ve never experienced. Have I been protective of people I care about? Of course. But have I ever been jealous and possessive like this? Never.
Is it because I’m sober? Is this part of the real me? I suppose it could have been suppressed by the drugs and alcohol. Fuck knows I’ve never been so intrigued by a woman before. From the moment I saw O’Malley being an asshat to her, I’ve felt the tug to protect her.
Forcing myself to refocus on the concert tonight, I turn to Xan as he suggests a slight change to the set list. It’s exactly what I need to stop fixating on Hazel. Even if the sound of her voice and laughter chases all rational thought from my brain.
Seven
HAZEL
Jade askedif she could come with me to sign books this afternoon. She’s incredibly helpful to have around because she took excellent photos of me and suggested ideas for social media content. We had fun running around the bookstore for a few hours doing that. Her creative mind and eye for aesthetics is unmatched.
