Page 71 of The King's Man
I shook my head at my own stupidity and turned to look for something to give my attention to, but I couldn’t think except to let my head continue to spin about him.
I’d been so sure. It had felt soright.When he’d stared into my eyes and told me all the ways he saw me…
Was that what these Neph did? How they could continue to take women—because there was something magical in them that made the womanwantit?
No, I answered myself. I’d seen what the others were like. There was nothing seductive about that.
And yet… he’d been so clear.
I sucked in a breath as it hit me: He hadn’t been honoring my fear. He’d made me say I wanted it so I couldn’t come back and accuse him for it.
He’d been so clear with me so he could tell himself he wasn’t the bad guy.
God, I’d been so blind.
I shivered, fighting back to dual urge to slip across the tent and castrate him, and to sag into a weepy puddle of self-pity and self-disgust.
From the corner of my eye I saw Jann go still for a moment, then whirl to face me—as if he knew what I was thinking.
For a split second I panicked—had I sent my thoughts to him? Was that even possible?
But no… my mind was well defended. Guarded by a steel trap. I’d trained for years… Still, I did everything I could to make sure I’d galvanized those defenses and turned my focus back to the mountain of problems in front of me.
I swallowed, turning for the tent-flap because I didn’t know what else to do. There were only two choices: I could tell him I was hurt… or play it off like nothing.
In my experience, most men weren’t good atdemonstrationsof emotion. Particularly alpha-bulls who were accustomed to women fawning—not expecting decency.
And so, there was no choice.
As tears pinched my throat and my heart drummed, I shook my head and shut that shit down. He would not see mefeel.
“If you’re clean, and able to walk, I really do need to go see Yilan. Perhaps you could deign to accompany me to Melek’s tent? I’m sure he’d be happy to watch over me for a couple of hours if you need a nap?”
I made myself turn to face him, grinning a challenge—but a good-natured one.
Jann, halfway through dressing, blinked at me. Then his heavy brows drew down, and he turned away to pick up his weapon straps. “Of course,” he said quietly.
I sighed when he still wouldn’t look at me and planted my fists on my hips. “Look, Jann, I’ve been a soldier for a long time—not as long as you, I understand, but still. This isn’t anything to be nervous about. I’m not going to hover around you like a brainless chit. In fact, I need to thank you. Sometimes we all need a good romp to heal, right? So… Thank you. For helping me.”
“Helping,” he said, his voice low and dead. “That’s what that was?”
“Do you have another word you’d prefer that I used?”
He had his back to me and his head turned like he was stretching his neck, rolling his jaw. But he was still in the middle of buckling his belt, so I couldn’t see him clearly.
“No,” he answered shortly.
“Good. Then if you don’t mind helping me get to Melek, you can have a couple of hours to yourself if—”
“I need to see Melek as well,” he said flatly.
I swallowed the urge to tell him that wasn’t what he’d said a few minutes ago. It didn’t seem wise to antagonize him.
“Thank you!” I said, too brightly.
He nodded as he turned, but didn’t smile.
When he turned for the tent-flap without a word and my heart did that strange flip—a moment of panic at the thought of him leaving without me—I wanted to scream.
