Page 105 of Lone Star Longing
“He wanted to be here,” Poppy whispered.
“And who’s this?”
“Another friend, Beck,” Lacey said, mortified. She did not want these people knowing her business. She wanted to snarl at Beck to ask what he was doing here, but she would wait. She was here for the babies, for her own peace of mind as she learned what she needed to do. She did not want to be in the middle of a drama.
“I came down from Midland,” he said. “Took longer than I thought.”
“You can never have too many friends,” Alicia said, though there was a furrow between her brows. “Should we be expecting anyone else?”
Lacey gave a pointed look to Poppy, who shook her head, though she seemed to find this all more humorous than Lacey did.
Alicia began the instruction, and Lacey focused on it, not on Beck sitting beside her. She was completely tense, not really wanting him to know all this about her, not really wanting him to think about her cervix or her vaginal canal or any of the other indignities that came with childbirth.
At the first break, she was the first out the door, moving faster than she had in months, motioning for them both to come with her.
“What are you doing here?” She demanded of Beck, turning on him when they were out the sliding door. Walking into the heat of the evening air was like walking into a wall.
“I wanted to be here for you, and Poppy let me know what time to get here. I’m sorry I was late and embarrassed you.”
“It’s not that. You know that if I’d wanted you to come, you could have asked me, right? What time and day? But you went behind my back and asked Poppy, right?”
His face flushed a little. “I want to be a part of this, Lacey. I thought we’d gotten to that point in our relationship.”
Her temper flared, and she wanted to point out they had barely kissed in their relationship, but just then one of the other couples walked out. Lacey couldn't remember her name, but the woman sat on the concrete bench nearby and fluttered her hand near her face.
“Stuffy in there.”
It wasn’t exactly cool out here, being late August, so Lacey just smiled and nodded, and drew Poppy and Beck down the sidewalk a little farther.
“Do you want me to go?” Beck asked softly.
“He came all this way,” Poppy inserted, of course taking his side.
“Oh, you and I are going to have a talk on the way home,” Lacey pointed to her friend. Then to Beck, “No, I’m not going to send you home, but I don't want you in the delivery room. It’s going to be hard enough, you know.”
“Lace, that’s why I want to be there. I want to take some of that from you.”
“I don't think anyone can take it from me. It’s all me, you know. This part. All me.” She pressed her hands to her temples, as if she could block out those thoughts.
“Lace, you’re going to be great. And we’re going to be there for you. Both of us, okay?” Poppy asked.
Lacey nodded slowly. What choice did she have? Beck leaving at the break would only cause more speculation. “We’ll talk about this more later,” she said, and led the way back in, stopping at the snack table to get a short bottle of water before resuming her seat.
She was almost able to relax during the rest of the class, as she learned about the stages of labor and what to expect.
“I’m sorry I didn't ask you,” Beck said as he walked them to their car after class. “I knew you’d say no, and I didn't want to hear it. But if you don't want me to come back, tell me, and I won’t.”
“I just don't see the point in you driving all this way, when you won’t be in the delivery room. You don't need to know this.”
He nodded, looking out over the parking lot, not meeting her gaze.
“Let me think about it, all right?” she asked with a sigh. She didn't want to hurt his feelings, but if he’d asked her, she would have had time to think about it. “Will you be in town this weekend?”
“Yeah, but not until Sunday again.”
“You come all this way for one day?”
“Worth it,” he said with a smile, then inclined his head toward Poppy, sending her the silent message to get lost, before he curved his hand around Lacey’s jaw and dropped a kiss on her mouth. “Be safe going home.”
