Page 73 of Hearts on Ice
“So why would you go ahead and come out?” The question bounced off the ice, the walls of the rink. “This is not what I want.”
“You want this to be a success, right, and it won’t be if you’re recording it on a camera phone and editing it with, what, free software, and uploading it onto social media.” The disdain in his voice was clear.
“We like how we’re doing it,” she said, exasperated. “We’re having fun, and if it doesn’t pan out the way we want, then, sure, maybe we’ll think about getting professional about it, but for now, this is ours, Declan’s and mine.”
She understood now why Declan was so upset. He thought she’d brought Xavier here to give away something they had between them, something they owned. She wanted to talk to him now, make him hear her, make him let her explain. She could only imagine what was going through his mind right now. Betrayal, she was sure.
“Colby, imagine how cool it would be to get drone shots of all your maneuvers. You’ve seen the other videos that do it. Your cameraperson, no offense,” he said to Sandra, “stays in one spot and misses so much of the elements.”
“We accommodate for that.”
“Right, but you shouldn’t have to. Come on, just go through one routine and let me show you what we can do.”
Colby exchanged a look with Sandra, wondering what to do. She had about an hour before Josh and Lexi showed up, anyway. She may as well see.
But she was never going to get Declan to agree to this.
She stepped onto the ice, wondering if she could outskate her thoughts. But no, Declan was there on the ice with her, so much that she could almost feel his hands on her, so she skated a little faster, landing her spins, her jumps.
The conversation she’d had with Meghan the other day played through her head, her reticence to stay in one place, to be with Declan, to build a life with him. She just hadn’t been sure of what she wanted until right now.
She wanted him. She’d had seven years without him. She hadn’t been happy. She hadn’t been satisfied. But being back here, working side by side with him again had been fulfilling. While she hadn’t really been able to look forward, to see their future, now that she feared she might be without him, well, she wanted nothing else.
How could she convince him she loved him? Loved a life with him? She had made zero good decisions in her life. How did she even start to figure this out?
Worrying about Declan made her uptight, and her tension threw her off balance. The buzz of the drone following her didn’t help. She made mistake after mistake before giving up and skating back over to a skeptical Xavier.
“I’ve seen your other videos. You aren’t that out of practice,” he said.
“My heart isn’t in it,” she said. One other time her heart wasn’t in skating, and that was when she’d left Declan.
God, please don’t let her be making the same mistake twice.
“We’ll come back tomorrow,” Xavier said, motioning to his crew to follow. “Give you some time to pull it together. Declan, too.”
Would he come back tomorrow? Would a day make a difference?
Before she could give it much thought, Josh and Lexi entered the rink, their mothers behind them.
Colby skated over to the wall and strained to look at them around Xavier and his departing crew. “Declan decided to take the day off,” she told them, not wanting to explain further.
“The day off?” Melina questioned, her tone.
“The kids are at the point in the routine they can do it without him, and I’m here to help,” Colby assured them. “I know all the routines.”
Melina looked skeptical, but she and Cindi exchanged a glance that seemed to calm her somewhat. Taking that as approval, Colby motioned the kids out on the floor.
The kids were much more relaxed about her taking over than their mothers were. They had the routine down pretty solidly, the elements, at least. The transitions were still giving them problems, and their first competition with this routine was only three weeks away. She might have to get them off their skates and into the gym to work on transitions.
She tried to think of how Declan would coach them, and thought she did a pretty good job copying his method. She’d worked with him long enough to know his concerns, his solution, even his turns of phrase. She knew the kids noticed, because when she told them to breathe through the lift together, they both turned to smile at her. Overall she thought Declan would be pleased with their practice.
Once the kids left, Colby had to turn to a more challenging task.
She needed to call her mother.
When the phone went to voicemail, she just hit redial. Her mother was going to speak to her today one way or another.
She wondered, after probably the twentieth call, if her mother was ducking her. She had to know what Colby intended to say. She wasn’t that cowardly, was she?
