“Give me an honest answer or leave,” I said firmly, pointing to the door.
“Seeing you with a guy like that, dressed like that… it re-opened an old wound.” His face was more open and vulnerable than I’d ever seen it, his words honest. But they hurt me nonetheless because I knew that this was all about Sienna.
I should have known. Hadn’t he compared me to her and I’d fallen short?
“He’s not my boyfriend. He just gave me a ride home from Sienna’s engagement party. But you lied to me, didn’t you? You’re not over her.”
That was the only logical explanation for his behavior. I stood up from my chair and skirted past him. Since he didn’t seem inclined to leave, I would.
“I didn’t fucking lie to you,” he gritted out.
I ignored his words because he’d given me no other explanation. “I’m not Sienna. And I’m not your consolation prize.”
My hand was on the doorknob ready to leave when his words stopped me.
“I know that.” His voice grew closer, but I kept my back to him, waiting to hear what else he had to say. “She fucked with my head, and I’m over her, but I still bear the scars. We were bad for each other. I know I fucked up. Give me another chance to get it right.”
Slowly, I spun around to face him. He bit his bottom lip, his stormy eyes so hopeful it made my heart ache. More than anything, I wanted to give him another chance but I couldn’t. “It hurt so much when you left me like that. It hurt more than it should have because we hadn’t even been together that long.”
“I feel like I’ve known you forever.”
I took a shaky breath. His honesty was so disarming. “What happened to you? Why did you leave like that?”
“My mother died. Committed suicide.” I sucked in a breath. Oh, my God. “She called me that night I was with you, but I missed her call. And I spent the last month thinking that if I’d answered her call, maybe I could have stopped her.”
I could hear the guilt in his voice, and the grief, as if he actually believed that his mother’s death had been his fault. Sucking in a huge gulp of air, I tried to come up with something, anything, I could say to make his pain stop. There was nothing.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Dylan.”
“Don’t be,” he said gruffly. “She was a shitty excuse for a mother.”
“But you loved her.” It was a guess. He’d never really talked about his mother.
He lifted one shoulder in a shrug, his eyes not meeting mine. “In my own fucked-up way, yeah, guess so.”
Not knowing what to do but needing to do something, I wrapped my arms around him, tentative at first. When he didn’t pull away, I held him tighter and his arms came around me.
I held onto him like I never wanted to let him go. This beautiful broken boy who could be so cruel. The only boy I’d ever loved.
The events of the past month ran through my head. The way he’d hurried me out of his house that morning then dropped me off. The night he’d gotten so drunk and begged me to stay because he didn’t want to be alone. But I’d left him and now I wondered if everything would have been different if only I’d stayed.
Everyone leaves.
And I did too.
I knew something was wrong when I saw him by the elevators that morning, but I’d been so frustrated by his lack of communication. And he’d never said a word about what he was going through.
“I could have been there for you, if you’d have let me,” I said, tears springing to my eyes unbidden when I remembered the pain etched on his face the night I’d picked him up outside The Last Stand. “It wasn’t your fault, Dylan. Your mother’s death wasn’t your fault.”
He buried his face in my hair for a few seconds before he released me and took a step back, scrubbing his hand over his face. Sometimes, like that night at the hospital and right now, I got a glimpse of the boy that he must have been. And something about seeing this tough guy looking so vulnerable made my heart ache.
“Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you say something?”
“I needed to tell Remy first. I only told her a couple days before I came to see you.”
It was Remy’s mother too. I’d been so wrapped up in my own drama that I’d forgotten that. I hadn’t seen Remy since I stopped by to visit Kai last week, so she hadn’t known yet. And I guess it wasn’t the kind of thing Shane would go around telling people.
“But why?” I asked, confused as to why he would keep it from his own twin.