Page 128 of When the Stars Fall
Ha! That would teach him to fuck girls called Bianca.
Chapter Forty-Four
Jude
Fuck.That’s not right. When in doubt, Google it.
“Mommy can do it,” Noah said. “Mommy knows how to do everything.”
Pretty sure my man card would be revoked if I didn’t get this right. “She does. But I’ve got this.” Sliding my phone back into my pocket, I cracked my knuckles and rolled out my shoulders. “One more try.”
He sighed. “Okay.”
I untied the bow tie and started over. This time it looked halfway decent. I wet a comb and ran it through his hair then held him at arms-length. “You look handsome, slugger.”
He grinned. I snapped a photo and sent it to Lila. Her response was immediate.
Lila: My baby. Why does he look so grown up? My heart can’t handle it.
I bumped my fist against Noah’s. “You ready to go?”
He nodded.
“Everything okay back there?” I asked him as we drove to Sadler’s Creek Vineyard. The last time I saw Lila’s friend, Sophie, I was coked up and drunk off my ass. I was surprised she’d even consider letting me attend her wedding.
When Noah didn’t answer, I eyed him in the rearview mirror. He’d been quiet for the entire drive which wasn’t like him. The kid was usually talking my ear off.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. He was staring out his window, his face troubled.
“Are you my new daddy now?”
Well, shit, I hadn’t seen that one coming. And I’d be damned if I didn’t wish I could say yes. “No. Your daddy will always be your daddy. He’s coming home tomorrow.”
Happy day. I couldn’t wait. But I kept my feelings to myself. This wasn’t about me.
“You kissed my mommy.”
“Yeah, I did. Is that okay with you?”
No answer. We were almost at the vineyard, so I kept driving. I swung a left, pulled up to the valet and put the car in park. No expense had been spared for this wedding.
After exiting the car, I handed the keys to the attendant. I opened the back door, but before I unbuckled Noah’s seat belt, I probed him for answers. “Are you upset that I kissed your mommy?”
He shrugged, not looking at me. “Noah. Look at me.”
“No.” He kicked the seat with the heels of his feet. “I want out.”
I rubbed the back of my neck and tried to figure out what to say to him. He was too young to understand the craziness of this situation and I didn’t want to put him in the middle of it. I wasn’t his father. I was just his uncle who also happened to be the man who loved his mother. Was it my place to tell him what the score was?
“Does it make you mad when I kiss your mommy?” I asked, trying a different tactic.
He shook his head. Relieved that it didn’t make him angry, I forged on.
“How does it make you feel?” I sounded like a shrink, and fuck if I didn’t hate that question. Noah obviously felt the same way. He scowled at me. How could I expect a four-year-old to have all the answers when I didn’t have them either?
“I love your mom. I’d never do anything to hurt her.” Lies. But that was all in the past. “And I’d never do anything to hurt you, okay?”
He relented a bit, like he was listening and absorbing the information. Processing it in his head and trying to make sense of it.
