Page 161 of When Wrecked Meets Ruined
“Guess I got attached to it. I would have brought the Audi i8, but it’s not good off-road.”
“I’m glad you didn’t. I prefer the truck to a fancy car.” I almost planted my feet on the dash, but I wasn’t eighteen anymore, so I crossed my legs instead and pretended to be a lady. “Where are you taking me?” I asked when he pulled out of the driveway of Quinn and Jesse’s rambling stone house.
“I’m your tour guide for the evening. Tonight’s itinerary includes some sites that are off the beaten track. Only a true local knows about them.”
I scoffed. “You’re from Chicago, and you live in New York, city boy.”
“But this is my adopted home.”
“You feel like you belong here now?”
He glanced over. “Yeah, I do. Took me a while, but this is where my family is.” His words made me happy. Finally, he’d accepted that he was a part of the family, and he didn’t feel like an outsider anymore.
“Whenever I come back, I feel like I can get away from all the pressure and just relax and unwind.”
Ridge looked cool and relaxed like he didn’t have a care in the world. He looked happy too, and I wondered if it was because of Carina. But I didn’t ask. I wasn’t ready to talk about his girlfriend. Maybe I’d never be ready. I’d always hated thinking about him with anyone who wasn’t me, and time hadn’t changed that.
He took the road that cut through the limestone cliffs, and I knew exactly where he was taking me. On a trip down memory lane.
We got tacos to go from the roadside taco joint, and when we were back in the truck, he drove to his brother’s ranch. The original farmhouse with a wraparound porch still looked the same, but they’d built a new addition that blended in with the original architecture.
“Are they home?” I asked as we drove past their house.
He shook his head. “They took Zane and Noah on a camping trip. They’ll be back in a few days.”
Ridge made the unilateral decision to roll down our windows as the truck bumped over the narrow dirt paths that cut through the ranch, but I didn’t complain. The air smelled fresher and sweeter here, and I inhaled a deep breath as we drove past the barn and paddocks.
This place held some of my best memories. In fact, every memory I conjured up was a good one.
* * *
We parked at the top of the hill overlooking the valley and the wild horses below, and Ridge spread a blanket on the grass under a tree. He’d come prepared. We set up our picnic of tacos and root beer for me, water for Ridge, and he produced a container of the biggest, reddest cherries I’d ever seen.
“Dessert,” he said. “You can practice your party trick.”
Tying a cherry stem with my tongue and the roof of my mouth. “It’s a special talent.”
“It was pure torture. I was hard for days after that.” He laughed. “Pretty sure I spent that entire summer with a boner.”
I laughed. “I remember.”
Ridge leaned his back against the tree while he ate, one leg bent at the knee and the other kicked out in front of him. I sat cross-legged with my eyes on the view, but I could feel him watching me, his eyes on my profile. I wondered what he saw when he looked at me now.
I finished the last bite of my taco and took a sip of my root beer as Ridge shifted and came to sit next to me.
“I owe you an apology,” he said, leaning back on his elbows, his eyes on the view. I looked down at his face. The lips that I’d kissed hundreds of times. The soulful brown eyes and the squared jaw and high cheekbones. I still loved his face.
“For what?”
“Last time we were together….” He squinted into the setting sun that cast a warm glow on his face, and I thought the little lines around his eyes made him even sexier. “I was only thinking about myself,” he said, choosing his words carefully. “I was so caught up in my own hurt and anger that I didn’t stop to think how my actions affected you.” He sat up and leaned his forearms on his knees. “I wanted to punish you for what you did to me.”
I knew that. I think we punished each other. “I didn’t blame you for that. I never should have left you the way I did.” I watched the mustangs running across the valley below us. So wild and free. “If I had to do it over again, I would have tried to find a better way. It’s one of my biggest regrets.” I drew my legs to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, resting my chin on my knees. “The therapist told me I had PTSD.”
Ridge nodded. “Makes sense. How are you doing with everything?”
“Better. Much better.” And this time, it was true. Now I could have sex without freaking out, and I didn’t see that man’s face every time I closed my eyes at night. “Every now and then, I have a bad dream, but it’s not that often anymore.” I turned my head to look at him. “How about you? With Elijah, I mean.”
“I still think about him a lot, but only because I want to. When I feel like I’ve left it all on the field and I don’t have another ounce of energy left in me, he’s the voice in my head that urges me on and tells me not to be a pussy. Go long, McCallister. Give it all you got.”
