Page 36 of My Favorite Secret
Panicked and shocked back to reality, I climb off Felix at lightning speed, fixing my dress and checking in the overhead mirror that it’s not obvious Felix just gave me an orgasm.
“You’re sure you don’t know why Tyler is here?” I ask, guilty as ever, because all I’ve wanted is to mend things between me and Tyler. What if that’s why he’s here, to fix us, and I’ve been riding Felix’s hand?
“Your guess is as good as mine.”
I climb out of the car and try to act normal as I walk toward the front door of the house. Felix follows, not saying a word to me and keeping his distance.
“Dad, is everything all right?” I ask, arriving at the front steps. “Felix picked me up from ballet. Did Mom tell you?”
I smile at Tyler, trying to signal that I know things are tense between us, but that I’m happy to see him.
“Harper…” Tyler doesn’t smile back. Perhaps he’s still angry with me. His eyes are gentle, though. Sorrowful.
Something is wrong. Why is he here? Why are the two of them standing on the front porch, waiting for us?
“Honey…” Dad’s voice breaks. His lips tremble. Now that I take a closer look, his eyes are bloodshot, as though he’s been crying. I’ve never seen him like this before. “I tried to call you. Your mother has been in a car accident. She…”
Dread instantly claims me. “What happened? Is she okay?”
Dad shakes his head. The little composure he had crumples, and tears fall down his cheeks. “I’m so sorry, honey. She’s… gone.”
Gone.
The word haunts me. It doesn’t make sense. My heart is pounding. There’s a deafening ringing in my ears. I can’t breathe. My father says something else, but I don’t hear it. Nothing around me registers. How can Mom be gone when I saw her a few hours ago?
She’salwayshere. She’salwayswith me. Shealwaysloves me, even when I’m mad with her.
Gone.
My knees buckle and I collapse. Someone catches me from behind. They hold me tight, hugging me, then scoop me into their arms and carry me somewhere. I don’t know who it is. I don’t care. Nothing registers except the one word that will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Gone.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
TYLER
“It’s nearly midnight. You should get some rest. I can take care of Harper,” I tell Felix.
We’re back at the Winslow penthouse in Manhattan, in Harper’s bedroom. The room is dark, all but for a bedside lamp. My brother holds Harper while she sleeps. It’s the strangest sight as I stand at the foot of her four-poster bed. For years, neither of them wanted anything to do with the other. Now, they’re inseparable. Felix has refused to let her out of his arms.
Harper’s subconscious is clinging to Felix, not me. I wish she were clinging to me, but I’m not jealous. All I care about is taking her pain away. She’s lost her mother and I’m pleased she has a source of comfort.
Clara’s death doesn’t feel real for me yet. My grief is locked away somewhere I can’t reach, buried under the need to keep Harper together. I’ll grieve later, once everyone else is taken care of.
“I’m not leaving Harper,” Felix murmurs to prevent waking her. “She needs me.”
My brother hasn’t had a moment to himself, other thanbathroom breaks. It’s been three days since we lost Clara and he’s barely eaten or slept. He’s constantly watching over Harper. I haven’t wanted to leave her side either, but I’ve checked on Thomas several times, along with preparing food for the four of us, regardless that no one has an appetite.
I keep replaying the events of that horrific day in my mind—ditching school and driving to the Hamptons midday, angry with Harper but so in love with her that I needed to fix things between us; arriving at the beach house, finding Thomas in ruins over the phone call he’d received about Clara’s accident; Harper collapsing when Thomas gave her the news.
Felix caught Harper before she hit the ground. He wouldn’t let go of her and rocked her in his arms as she wept. I don’t think she knew he was with her. She became unresponsive to anything anyone said. I felt so helpless. I still do.
Thomas was adamant that we immediately return to the city where he and Harper could be in their home. The only way I could make myself useful was by driving the four of us back to the city in my car.
I’ll never forget how disturbing the drive was, with Thomas distraught in the front passenger seat and Felix in the back, cradling Harper as she clung to him, sobbing.
“She should be clinging to you.” Felix nods at Harper asleep in his arms, drawing my thoughts back to the present. “What do you think this is about?”
