Page 20 of Free Heart
“A year at a minimum, to be frank,” Dr. Eldridge says with a hint of what sounds like empathy edging into his matter-of-fact tone. “I know that’s going to be hard for you. It always is for athletes. But the good news is you’re young, healthy, and active, and that means you’ll heal faster and better than many others. It’ll also give you some time to really think about what you want out of life before you do anything so risky again.”
That last bit is tacked on like a scolding.
I bristle, but Sejin just squeezes my hand tighter and starts asking questions about physical therapy, plan of care, and other things that go right over my head in the buzzing panic that has set in after the words “a year at a minimum.”
Dr. Eldridge goes through the next steps with Sejin, who takes out his phone and starts making notes. In my mind, I play back what I’ve started to remember from the day of my Heart Route free solo attempt.
I woke up in bed with Sejin.
I went out to my van.
That’s it.
I still remember nothing else. I don’t know if the climb went wrong from the start, or if I’d gotten overconfident because I’d been flowing well. I know I’d made the dyno, at least. Otherwise, I’d be dead now and not just a little broken.
“Thank you, doctor.” Sejin rises to shake the man’s hand.
Dr. Eldridge turns to me next. “You were a lucky son of a gun. I hope you know that. You’ll be in good hands with your boyfriend here, and if you do what the physical therapists tell you to do, you’ll be climbing again by next October.”
I rouse enough of the manners Peggy Jo has instilled to say, “Thanks for doing a good job on my leg.”
“Of course, of course.” He clasps my hand and leans close. “Don’t let me see you again, alright? Not here in the hospital and not as a grim news report. Got it?”
“Got it.”
He sweeps out of the room like a man with somewhere important to be, and he probably does. I’ve never had anywhere to go that required sweeping away like that, but it’s impressive. I decide to try it sometime to see how it feels—when I can walk again.
“Well,” Sejin starts, and he sounds tired. “I guess the first thing we need to do is figure out how to get you home.”
“Rye’s coming for us this afternoon. In your car, I think.”
“Oh yeah, right. Good.” He rubs his head. “I’m discombobulated. There’s so much going on.”
“He’ll be here…” I check my phone. “Probably before they get me checked out.”
I reach out for his hand again, and he gives it to me. “You’ve been great.”
I want him to know I appreciate all he’s doing for me. He doesn’t have to, after all. We’ve only been dating a couple of months. “All those questions you had for him? I’d never have known to get that information.”
“It’s no problem.”
“How’d you know to ask about that stuff?”
“My mom,” he offers with a sad smile. “There were lots of hospital visits and plans of care to be made near the end of her life.”
He clears his throat and stands up, running a hand through his long hair. “Let’s not talk about that, though. You’re going to be fine.”
“Yeah. In a year,” I say bitterly.
Sejin opens his mouth to issue some sort of reply, and from the way his brow furrows and his eyes flash, it’s possibly not going to be a very pleasant one, but he suddenly looks down at his phone and frowns. “Fuck.”
“What?”
“Text from Pete. I have to be at Papa Bear tomorrow. Opening shift.”
“It’s fine.”
“No, it’s not fine. Who’ll take care of you? How will you—”
