Page 95 of Hang the Moon
Annie nodded.
Elle wrinkled her nose, eyes darting up and to the left, thegears in her head visibly whirring. “I’d need your whole chart, but Gemini is your opposite sign, so the season tends to affect you strongly. I’d say now is a pertinent time to consider ridding yourself of the baggage that doesn’t belong to you so you can make room for who you’re meant to be.”
Everything Elle had said resonated, but Annie was pretty sure that had nothing to do with its being Gemini season and everything to do with her own mixed-up feelings.
“Astrology aside”—Elle shot her a conciliatory smile—“you’re struggling with what you want and what youthinkyou should want, right?”
Annie pressed a palm to her forehead and sighed. “I don’t know? Yes?”
“Do you love him?” Elle asked, completely out of the blue.
Sweat broke out along her hairline. It had beentwo weeks. “Not yet. But I think I could. Is that crazy? Oh my God, please don’t answer that.”
Elle laughed. “If you want my opinion, it doesn’t sound like you want to move to London. What part of the equation is tripping you up here?”
The timing? The magnitude of the decision awaiting her? The idea of rearranging her whole life?
She was at a crossroads. Not having a job in Philadelphia meant there was nothing there for her. She could go through with the plan and move to London, start over there, or, technically, she could move anywhere she wanted, assuming she could find a job.
She liked everything Seattle had to offer: her best friend livedhere; there were people here she liked and wanted to know better, people she could see letting herself get close to. The city was beautiful.
And then there was Brendon.
He wasn’t her sole reason for considering the wildest decision of her life, but he was certainly a piece of the puzzle. She liked him, more than a little. She already cared about him, which was scary all on its own.
She shrugged. “I don’t feel particularly invested in moving to London or the job there. It all sounds great on paper. Good pay. A chance to put down roots. But I don’t...careabout it.”
“But there are things you care about here? People you care about?”
Annie nodded.
“Isn’t that a good thing?” Elle frowned.
She shrugged.
“Caring about people isn’t a weakness, you know,” Elle said.
Annie gave a sharp laugh, then winced. “No, no it’s not. As long as you don’t care too much.”
“There’s no such thing as caring too much.”
What an utterly sweet, guileless sentiment. “It’s when you start hoping that others will care that you wind up in hot water.”
“You think Brendon doesn’t care about you?”
I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.
Annie swallowed hard. “No, I believe he does. But it’s been thirteen days. I think he cares now, but...” She shook her head. “Brendon’s never been in a relationship before. Not one that lasted longer than a few weeks. I believe he wants me now, but what happens if he changes his mind? Right now, everything isnew and exciting, but what happens when it’s not new? What happens if I pack up and move across the country and he decides I’m not what he wants anymore?”
If she didn’t live up to the fantasy expectations he had in his head of what a relationship was supposed to be?
Elle offered her a tiny smile and reached out, resting her hand on Annie’s arm. “You’re worried it’s going to go wrong, but what if it goes right? What if Brendon turns out to be the best thing that ever happened to you?”
Chapter Nineteen
You think they’re ever going to give us a gay season ofThe Bachelor?”
Darcy dug her chopsticks into her carton of pad thai. “What’s that spin-off show? The one where they sequester the rejects on an island?”
