Page 78 of The Devil She Knows
“A high fever can cause delirium; you’re speaking in tongues.”
Sam glowered. “I don’t know the name of it, okay?SomethingKruger. And, yes, I see the irony in what I’m saying, but you know just enough to think you know more than you do.” She poked Daphne in the cheek. “Mount. Stupid.”
Daphne turned her head and nipped at Sam’s fingers. “My sins are many, but hubris isn’t one of them. At least not of late.”
Sam’s jaw ticked. “That’s stupid.”
“What is?”
“All of it.” Sam rubbed the heel of her hand against her chest where it felt like there was a weight sitting, squeezing. “What gave anyone the right to be judge, jury, and executioner of somebody’s fate?”
A noise came from the back of Daphne’s throat like the sound of a creaking door. “That’sblasphemous, but all right.”
Sam snorted. Whoever was keeping score could add thatto her tally. “I know you probably think I’m crazy for getting all incensed about this.”
“No.” Daphne’s brows furrowed slightly. “But why are you? Incensed by any of it? I’m not and it’s my fate we’re talking about.”
“You mean other than me not loving the idea of you spending an eternity as a ghost?” Sam was offended that needed to be said.
“Yes.”
Sam sighed. Here went nothing. “Okay, look, I … I stopped going to church when I was twelve, not because I didn’t believe in … some higher power, but because I couldn’t stomach the thought of spending another Sunday being told I was going to burn in hell because I had a crush on my best friend. That I was twisted, a perversion, wrong and brimming with sin because I didn’t want to marry a boy one day. That I needed to repent, thatmysin was just as great and terrible as that of someone who committed true acts of atrocity.”
Even in the dark, she could see Daphne’s face fall. “Sam—”
“I’m not saying your hands are clean. But whose are? You said it,no one’s ever wished for world peace. You weren’t a snake whispering in somebody’s ear, Daphne. I doubt you damned anybody who wouldn’t have damned themselves in one way or another.”
“Yes, well, this gun is guilty, Sam,” Daphne said, rubbing her eyes. “And your church? The one you grew up going to? Is small-minded and regressive and just plain wrong. Trust me, we’d be dealing with an overcrowding problem if being queer got you a ticket to Hell. Now, those who preach hate,on the other hand, there’s a special place reserved in the eighth circle for sowers of religious schism and discord.”
Sam harrumphed. “Small favors.”
Daphne reached out, grabbing her hand. “My fate is what it is, Sam. There’s nothing either of us can do about it. Therefore, what’s the use discussing it? There are so many better things we could be talking about right now. So many better things we could be doing …”
Her thumb brushed across the middle of Sam’s palm, tickling a little.
Sam’s brain was stuck on the logistics. “Then what’s the plan? You’ve got to go find someone, right? Someone desperate, and make them an offer they won’t want to refuse?”
Until she did that and got her soul back, everything else was moot.
Daphne sighed and rolled onto her back, stared up at the ceiling. “That is how it works.”
“So? When are you going to start … sniffing?”
“I’m not a bloodhound.” Daphne heaved another, heavier sigh and opened her mouth like she was going to say something. She paused, pressed her lips together briefly, and tried again. “Can we just enjoy the next few days without talking about any of this? Please?”
Maybe it was the plaintive way Daphne had saidplease, the fact that she’d said it at all, but Sam’s stomach twisted with that sixth sense that something was off.
“Is there a reason you don’t want to talk about it?”
“It’s not exactly ideal pillow talk, for one.”
She didn’t even look at Sam when she said it, and more warning bells went off inside her brain.
“Is there something you’re not telling me?” Sam tried hard not to let irritation creep into her tone, succeeding by maybe ninety-eight percent. The two percent couldn’t be helped; she’d thought they were past omissions and bush beating.
Daphne went incredibly still. “What makes you think that?”
The weight sitting on her chest grew heavier. She sat up. “Maybe the fact that you won’t give me a straight answer.”
