Page 33 of Fiends and Familiars
Adrienne
Thenerveof that man. Or demon. Whatever. I’d cried my eyes out, then came out of my bedroom to find an entire menagerie in my house. The squirrels had barricaded themselves in the kitchen and were chattering angrily at the hellhounds lazing around my living room floor. Drake played referee over the whole lot of them, perched on the coffee table and swiveling his head to eye each group with scorn.
I plopped down on the sofa and teared up again, struggling not to cry in front of his hellhounds, even though they’d stayed behind with me. Not that they’d chosen to. I’d commanded them, forced their wills to mine. I’d swore I’d never do such a thing, but I had. In anger.
But did I have any choice? If I hadn’t turned his hellhounds to my side, he would have taken that squirrel and done who knows what with the poor thing.
Drake nudged my shoulder with his beak, and I turned to bury my face in his musty smelling feathers.
“He was just using me,” I muttered into the bird. “Using me to get the squirrel.”
He cares about you, Yeth told me.He was not lying when he said we were not to hurt you. Ever since he met you in that bar, he has been under your thrall. Actually, he was under your thrall since he first entered your dream and you cast your witchy spell upon him.
Entered my dream? Holy shit on toast, had Ty actually been the sexy horned demon from my dream the other night? Even though that ratcheted up my libido quite a bit, it also made me even more pissed at him. Why the fuck had he entered my dream? Had he been plotting this since before I met him in Pistol Pete’s? Was this all a ruse to get the squirrel? Did I mean nothing to him at all?
As for him being enthralled by me…pffft. That was total bullshit. I’d never cast a spell over him. I’d done nothing but be myself. How dare he pull this “she enthralled me” crap, when he was the one catfishing me to get to a squirrel that was living in my house.
Drake hissed at the hellhound, then told me I should talk to the squirrel I’d named Hemorrhoid. I sniffed, thinking over what had happened from a less emotional perspective. Ty had claimed that Rhoid was an escaped soul, that he was someone named Faust.
I frowned, remembering my college literature classes. Was this the Faust who’d made a deal with the devil? If so, then his soul was destined for hell. But why was he a squirrel in my house? How had a fifteenth-century man who’d bargained his soul for riches and knowledge ended up a squirrel I’d evicted from a woman’s house?
How the mighty had fallen.
I pulled away from Drake and sniffed, wiping my eyes. The hounds were still chilling in front of me. The squirrels were still in the kitchen, anxious and restless. I closed my eyes and thought for a moment, then decided I needed to put my emotions and libido aside and get to the bottom of this whole thing.
“Hounds.” I stood and faced the lazy canines. “You all will sleep in my garage tonight. I release you. You are free to stay, sleep, and eat what I provide, or you may return to your infernal home and master. It’s your choice, but you cannot stay inside my house tonight.”
They stood and stretched, grumbling a bit at being denied a cozy night in my living room. I grabbed the bag of dog food I’d bought earlier, and they perked up, following me into the garage. I poured food into several bowls and dishes, then added a few blankets and pillows and several buckets of fresh water. Leaving the garage door open enough for them to go as they pleased, I wished them good night, then went back inside, sealing the wards around the garage. I trusted the hounds since I’d bound them to me, but I wanted to give them the freedom to leave if they chose, but not open my house up to whatever monsters might want to enter—including Ty.
“You,” I pointed at Rhoid. “I need to talk to you.”
The other three squirrels took off and hid under the couch. Rhoid looked as if he were about to do the same.
“I protected you. I stood here in my living room and faced down a demon and a pack of hellhounds to keep you from being dragged off to hell. The very least you owe me is an explanation.”
Rhoid squeaked and patted a little paw on his chest, an innocent-squirrel look on his face.
“Talk, or I’ll kick you outside of my house and outside of the wards,” I told him. “My magic is wearing off the hellhounds. They’ll hunt you down and have you within minutes without my protection.”
Rhoid sighed then hopped along the edge of the counter, leaping ten feet onto the nearest chair where he sat with his arms crossed in front of him.
“Are you really Faust?TheFaust?” I waited for his nod. “Tell me how you ended up in hell, how you managed to escape, and everything since then.”
I made a bargain with Satan when I was alive, he told me.Through smarts, trickery, and magic I managed to live for nearly three hundred years, but Satan finally outwitted me and I died, my soul forfeit to hell for all eternity.
I had no idea what his original bargain had been, but he’d gone into it with open eyes and managed to evade paying the price for far longer than had been the original intent of the deal. As much as the idea of hell’s punishments gave me the creeps, the guy had willingly entered into this deal.
After suffering for a few decades, I bribed and tricked a few demons, then stole Charon’s boat and managed to escape. But one of the demons I’d tricked was smarter than I thought and my resurrection spell came with a curse.
You’re a squirrel. That’s your curse.
He nodded.Do you know how sick I am of eating nuts and cracked corn? Of having sex with squirrels? I can’t even perform magic like this. He held up his tiny paws.Ever since I escaped hell I’ve been like this, trying somehow to break the curse.
“Well, I can’t help you break the curse. That’s not the sort of magic I can do,” I told him. What I didn’t tell him was that one of my sisters might be able to help him. Sylvie was a luck witch, and also had the opposite skill. If she couldn’t break a curse, then I was pretty sure Cassie could. But I wasn’t offering that up at this point. I might never offer that up. Being a squirrel was a better fate than being tortured in hell, and I couldn’t justify Rhoid avoiding all that he’d agreed to when he’d sold his soul to Satan. Plus hewasa bit of a jerk. There was a reason I’d named him Hemorrhoid, after all.
I didn’t come with you because I thought you could break the curse, although that would have been an added benefit, Rhoid said.I came with you because I knew you could protect me against Typhon and his hounds. I saw the effect you had on my squirrel friends, and knew you had the power to wrest control of the hellhounds away from their demon master. And I saw what a soft, weak, emotional response you had toward animals. I knew you’d protect me.
I was starting to regret that I had protected him. Rhoid had used me just as Typhon had used me. Both of them deserved to be tossed out of my house and left to their own fates. But if I’d escaped hell as a squirrel with a pack of hellhounds and demons after me, maybe I’d use a capable witch for my protection as well. I couldn’t completely blame Rhoid, even though hewasa total asshole.
