Page 10 of Grumpy Pucking Orc
“There.” Abby set her phone down. “We’ve got tickets to watch the Tusks play Toronto at the next home game. My treat.”
Willa turned her phone to face us. “Judging from some pics on Insta, it looks like the Tusks like to grab a post-game beer at McHenry’s Bar and Grill. It’s just four blocks the other side of the stadium. You ladies should down those brews so we can go ogle some buff green dudes.”
“Yes!”
“No!” I spoke the same time as Abby, then sighed as the two other women turned to face me, eyebrows raised.
“That felt like an oddly emphatic no,” Willa commented.
Abby rested her elbows on the table and propped up her chin. “Is there a reason you don’t want to go to McHenry’s?”
“I have to get home to my cat?” It was a lame excuse, but it was the only one I could think of that wouldn’t expose this strange insta-crush thing I’d developed on one of the orc players.
“Bullshit.” Willa laughed. “Your cat is going to be pissed at you whether you go home now or in three hours. I’m thinking there’s another reason you don’t want to go. You’re blushing like crazy.”
“There’s probably a whole team worth of teeth and tusks to examine at McHenry’s,” Abby teased. “And if you want to examine other body parts of a certain hot forward, I’m guessing he’d be eager and willing.”
Damn. My face was on fire, and all I could think about was the idea of my leg pressed against Ozar’s as I sat next to him at the bar. He’d offer to walk me to my car, then pull me into a walkway between two buildings, pushing me up against the wall and kissing me. His lips would be soft, his tongue insistent, his tusks firm against my face. He’d grab my ass with his big hands, hauling me up so I could wrap my legs around him and press myself against the hardness of his?—
“McHenry’s it is.” Abby downed the rest of her beer, then pushed mine toward me. “Drink up, girl. We’ve got hockey-orcs to ogle.”
Chapter 5
Ozar
Iwatched Jordan leave, then I went back into the stadium, strategizing my plan of attack.
Could she really be my true mate?
Did humans feel the mate bond like orcs did? If not, I’d need to plan my wooing very carefully to make sure I didn’t lose her to another. I’d been told stories of how orcs had won their mates, but those had beenorcfemales, and those females had felt the mating bond connection just as strongly as their partners. It would be a challenge for me to win Jordan over—especially since I knew so little about human females and human mating customs.
And I could be wrong. I’d never experienced a mate bond, and while this had felt like what those in my clan had described, it might just be simple lust. Either way, I wanted to explore these sudden emotions, wanted to see if what I’d felt when Jordan stepped close to me and touched my tusk lasted beyond tonight. Even if this wasn’t a mate bond, I was still attracted to her. From what I could tell in those brief minutes, I liked her. And that was enough for me to commit to wooing her. I needed a wife, and I had no doubt thatJordan would make me happy as we went through our lives together.
But how to woo her?
The two months I’d been here had been spent getting used to things like banking, public transit, and what humans considered crimes. We’d all been focused on learning English, knowing that not only would we need it to navigate this world while we remained here, but we’d also need to be able to speak to our potential brides. I hadn’t had time to delve into common human habits or their wooing customs, so I’d need to learn quickly to make sure I didn’t screw this up.
And then there was sex.
Did human females like the same things as orcs? I knew the nuts and bolts of the process were the same, but the rest of it was a mystery. I’d heard enough conversations to have determined that human females, just like orc females, had sex prior to marriage—most likely as part of their selection criteria. The thought made me break out in a sweat. What if I didn’t please Jordan? Releasing my seed in her would cement the mating bond for me—if there evenwasa mate bond. But if I failed to impress her with my prowess and she left my bed for another, more skilled male, I would be crushed.
And there was the question of whether I could even coax her to lay with me. I’d need to impress her long before I invited her to my furs. And I hadn’t the foggiest idea how to do that.
Thoughts of my failure filled my mind. Sweat broke out on my forehead, and rage filled my heart at the thought of losing Jordan to another. I prided myself on my control and dismissed the idea that I might harm Jordan or her chosen partner if I failed. Although the thought of her with anotherdid bring up violent thoughts. I’d just have to make sure I did everything correctly in wooing her, and that she found the sex beyond reproach.Everythingneeded to be beyond reproach.
Thankfully, the Zamboni machine hadn’t swept the ice yet, and I quickly found my two missing teeth. Then I headed into the locker room, looking for my teammates. As embarrassing as this situation was, I needed advice.
I especially needed Bwat to recommend materials to study on courting and sexually pleasing human females. Bwat had been the one who’d learned the spoken and written English the fastest, and he’d been devouring written materials and video programs in his spare time. Among the orcs on the team, Bwat was considered the expert on humans and life here in their realm.
The locker room was empty except for Sizzle. The slight demon was our equipment manager, and he was currently sorting through hockey sticks, muttering about the damage they’d suffered as a result of tonight’s game. I put my skates in front of my locker and eyed the demon.
Sizzle wasn’t a human, but demons had been living here far longer than I had, and the equipment manager might have good insights into how I should woo my mate.
I sat down next to the demon, who ignored me. “I have found a human female that I want to marry. I wish to make her mine,” I announced.
“Congratulations. Good for you.”
Sizzle’s monotone drawl sent the very clear message that he wanted me to go away, but I knew the value of perseverance. Wearing down an opponent with strength and stamina worked in battle, and there was no reason to think it wouldn’t work in conversation as well.
