Page 65 of First Comes Orc, Second Comes Baby
She was shorter for an Orcess, her tusks dainty, her graying dark hair twined in fat braids around her head, and a colorful sari in blues and greens almost blending with her skin.
“I don't know about this whole newfangled thing the young people do where they have babies before they get married. I don't know about it. We didn't do things like that in my day. If a girl got pregnant, she had a blade at the father’s throatbeforeshe started showing.”
“It's proof of concept,” Charlotte said. “Brahnt had to make sure I was fertile first. You know, so he could reliably carry on the dynasty.”
Brahnt gave Charlotte a flat, unamused look.
“But don't worry,” Charlotte assured her. “As soon as I'm back in shape after the baby's born, we’ll throw a wedding. The whole nine yards.”
“It will be traditional, of course,” Ati said, her tone ominous. “We have to uphold the honor of our clan.”
Charlotte nodded earnestly. “Of course. I'll look to you to guide me, Aunt Ati.”
Ati patted her cheek. “Such a respectful girl. I approve, Brahnt. We were so afraid you would marry a stripper, or one of those baristas. What did you say you do again, Charlotte?”
“I'm a professional classically trained dancer,” Charlotte said. “Ballet.”
Ati exclaimed, pressing a hand to her ample bosom. “Ballet. So refined. Not everyone can be a doctor. After you have the baby, you come to me, and I'll teach you Bhangra and help you plan the sangeet.”
“Don’t do it,” Milgrida muttered. “Don’t do it.”
“Sounds like fun,” Charlotte said, and meant it. “Oh here, let me friend you on Instagram. I have a maternity skin care shop now with my own branded merchandise, but if you DM me I can send you a discount code.”
“How much?”
“Twenty percent is the friends and family.”
“Surely you can do better for an auntie. I’ll put in a word with your local female’s circle.”
Charlotte considered. “Okay, thirty, but don’t share the code with anyone else. I only want people I like to have it.”
“Why don’t I have the code?” Caro interjected.
“I haven’t forgotten that knife incident.”
Caro’s expression darkened. “When I find out who one-starred my new release before it was even live. . .”
Inevitably, Charlotte had to pee. She had to talk Brahnt out of escorting her to the restroom. “I can go potty all by myself. I swear I haven’t forgotten how my urethra functions. That’s not the hole the baby comes out of, by the way.”
Brahnt scowled. “Go, you little smartass. Take your phone with you. If you need help call me immediately. I’ll instruct the staff to keep an eye on you.”
Charlotte rolled her eyes, left the outdoor party and entered the house.
When she left Brahnt's old en suite after taking way too long to do a number two because, no, that wasn't working right either these days, Regine intercepted her in the hallway.
“Charlotte. I'd like to speak with you.”
Charlotte stopped, looked around for Orcs in black suits and shades with discreet guns, saw none, and shrugged. Regine led her into an office, then gestured for Charlotte to take a seat.
After she was settled, Charlotte gave her a look of inquiry.
“I'm sure you're wondering what I wanted to talk to you about,” Regine said.
“Not really.”
Regine paused, then continued, “You and I both know the score. We’re females of the world.”
“Go on.” What she really wanted to know was; where Regine was getting her dialogue?
