Page 70 of First Comes Orc, Second Comes Baby
Charlotte recoiled, slapping a hand on his shoulder. “Don't pick me up! Have you lost your mind?”
He stared at her. “You're in labor.”
“I can still walk, Brahnt! Whatever you do, don’t try to pick me up.”
“I've been working out. I've had to, considering the weight you've put on.”
Charlotte stared. “You do realize there are so many ways I could misinterpret that statement.”
Brahnt stared back, expression blank. “You have put on weight. Around nine pounds of baby, plus all the extra blood and water and. . .stuff. Plus the additional fat reserves.”
Caro, still eating, snorted. “Bruh. Should have stopped before ‘fat reserves.’”
“I'm not saying you're not attractive, Charlotte,” Brahnt said, finally seeming to realize his mistake. “You’re preparing for breast-feeding, so of course you’re retaining. . .” he stopped before sayingthose two wordsagain.
“I can stand up on my own,” Charlotte snapped, and began the process. She didn’t need to worry about anything. She’d get back into dancing shape as soon as her postpartum period was over.
Absolutely nothing to worry about.
“Maybe I should lay off the roti.”
“What?” Ati said, as if Charlotte had suggested sacrificing her firstborn to Prada.
Brahnt rolled his eyes, slid an arm under Charlotte’s shoulders and helped her rise, then turned to his cousin.
“Milgrida, go get Charlotte's bag,” Brahnt said. “Caro, pack up Snowkiss. We'll drop her off at the sitter. Aunt At—”
“Don't boss me, boy,” she warned. “I've been to more birthings than you have fingers and toes. You get your female into the car, and Milgrida and I will follow after we pack up all the food.”
Caro pushed away from the table. “I guess I'm with you two. I’ll get the dandelion puff.”
Milgrida reappeared with the bag, which Auntie gave one final inspection as Caro strapped a yipping Snowkiss to her chest.
“You’ll have a little brother or sister soon,” Charlotte told her. “I’m sorry you can’t come with us.”
“Bag, door, car,” Brahnt was muttering as he strode out the door, having snatched the bag. “Bag, door, car. Damnit, I know there was more than that.”
Caro and Charlotte following at a more sedate pace. Brahnt reappeared in the hallway just as they made it through the threshold.
Charlotte gave Brahnt a withering look. “Forget something?”
“Why don't you take the bag and the dog to the car and get it started,” Caro said. “I'll help Charlotte.”
“Please,” Charlotte said, gritting her teeth as another contraction started. “Go get the car.”
The last thing she needed was a hysterical Orc running around her in a circle doing his best imitation of a frantic Snowkiss.
“He’ll settle down soon,” Auntie said after Brahnt disappeared down the hallway, bag on his shoulder and dog onhischest for once.
“And if he doesn’t,” Milgrida muttered, “she’ll have something special for that.”
“Breathe,” Caro murmured. “Do that breath work shit we were listening to on YouTube. You got this, twin.” She cleared her throat. “You want me to call Dad?”
“No.”
“Okay.” Caro squeezed her shoulder. She understood.
Charlotte couldn’t think about their mother right now either, so set that issue aside to deal with later. A new baby wasn’t going to fix years of estrangement.
