Page 28 of Sheltering Lawson
“You are completely terrible,” I whispered, closing my eyes.
“Use the sex bomb with him. Believe me. You won’t regret it,” she laughed softly and hung up.
I stood there lost in the sensual thought of the sheer luxury of taking a long bath with Ethan, reclining against him, feeling every contour of his hard body against mine, his smooth skin, the heat and the water making everything steamy and silky.
I gasped out a breath and ran my hands through my hair trying and failing to push that sensual thought away.
Back in the bathroom, I stripped down determined to relax and get some sleep. I had such a big day tomorrow with Brax wanting to start planning for his sister-in-law’s big blowout graduation party that was happening in the middle of the month, only about a week away.
I ran the water and added a generous amount of bath salts, the peppermint scent making me breathe deep. I cursed softly as I lit some candles, well aware of how they set the mood for relaxing and sex. The glass block reflected the soft light back at me, my reflection distorted. It was exactly how I felt as if I was being pulled in different directions, my heart torn nearly in two.
As soon as it was full, I dropped my robe and slipped in, folding down into the water with a deep sigh. My muscles hadn’t worked this hard in a long time, even stripping wasn’t as demanding.
I bit my lip, thinking about all the things I had done over the past year. I touched the butterfly necklace, taking a deep breath. I had eluded them for a year. That gave me great satisfaction.
I stayed in the water until it grew cold, then wearily, feeling as boneless as Brax’s chicken, I got out and dried off. I slathered on the jasmine lotion, then climbed into bed naked, liking the cool sheets against my clean and perfumed skin. As I snuggled down into the comfortable mattress, gratitude filled me. I touched the necklace one more time, my eyes going moist. I was so thankful I had seen that sign, that my car was empty, that I was on empty. I couldn’t imagine never meeting Brax or Sam or Sky, the tart…or…Ethan. God help me. What was I going to do? Many doubts chased me into sleep.
Before I knew it, my alarm was ringing and it was time to get out of bed. I went into the bathroom, brushed out my hair and pulled it back into a messy bun. Donning a pair of jeans and a white T-shirt, I walked into the kitchen and grabbed the handle. A warm breeze swept in through the door when I opened it, stirring the blinds at the kitchen window making them flutter. I closed my eyes, the bayou still dark, the low hum of life all around me. I’d dreamed last night of Ethan. Sensual, erotic dreams, feeling as if his body should have left an indentation in my mattress, his head on my pillow. My desire for him was getting worse. More intense. More explicit. More real.
It was such a disappointment to wake up alone. But how to make them stop?Oh, you know how, honey. You sure do.
Groaning out loud, I pulled the door closed with a little more strength then I meant to. Maybe if I just stayed away from him, it would help. But that was ludicrous. I worked with him.
I beat everyone into the kitchen. Still feeling strung out, I started the coffee, yawning.
“Good morning,” Ethan said his body behind mine, his face so close to me. I squealed and jumped, the carafe slipping out of my hand and shattering in the sink.
He was so apologetic, and he found every reason to touch me more than once before we had the glass cleaned up and had gotten a new carafe. His eyes strayed to my throat, and he smiled softly because I was wearing his gift. Finally, for my peace of mind, I shooed him into the dining room. I wished I could breathe a sigh of relief, let go of everything and let nature take its course with him.
But the one thing that nagged at me the most was I wasn’t exactly free. Far from it. I would have to tell Ethan everything if we got physical. He would see my back; he would be aware of what had happened to me. There was no escaping my past. It was locked to me like a heat seeking missile just waiting to explode.
How could I tell Ethan anything? How could I leave without telling him everything? How could I resist him at all?
Chapter 10
LAWSON
After about an hour, Braxton came into the kitchen. “Hey, Lawson.”
I smiled as I took his biscuits out of the oven. “Hey, boss.”
He narrowed his eyes at me. “What did I say about that?”
I grinned. I couldn’t help it. Totally ignoring his censuring eyes because I felt such affection for him, I said, “It was slow, so I decided to give you a hand.”
Brax didn’t smile often, but when he did, it was a heart stopping moment. “You are a hard worker, girl. I was telling my wife about what you are doing with my books, and how my inventory is now a breeze. She wants you to come to her gallery and do your magic there.”
“When?”
“Now. I hired a new girl yesterday, and she’s experienced, so get outta here and go help River Pearl.”
He handed me a business card with the address on it. “Okay, boss,” I said, removing my apron with a little giggle and scooting out the door. I headed to my car and got inside, but as soon as I turned the key, the engine sputtered and then died. For a moment I sat there, dismayed by the fact that I needed my car to work all the time just in case I had to run. I closed my eyes briefly and swallowed hard. I had thought before that I was free, but it hit me sitting here, my stomach churning, panic climbing my throat that I wasn’t free at all. I was constantly looking over my shoulder, constantly stressed, forever pursued.
I dropped my forehead to the wheel and could barely catch my breath. If I kept running, I would never get away, not from them and not from myself. I fingered the butterfly necklace, and it felt warm against my fingers as if what I needed came from deep inside me. Something yet untapped. Something I hadn’t had access to because I hadn’t taken one moment to consider my future. My real future.
Living in my car, going from job to job, changing my name, hiding out in Texas.Thatwas my reality! I started to tremble, clutching the butterfly so hard it bit into my palm. Taking shallow breaths, trying to get in control, real control. All I could do was direct myself, make my decisions and meet my needs. I had no control over anything or anyone else. Maybe it was time I re-examined what the hell I was thinking, and what this meant in the long-term. Because I was running scared and making decisions on the fly based out of fear.
Only here, in Suttontowne, in this beautiful place had I taken a breath, leaned on someone, allowed people into my life. Out here, my isolation was my own doing, whereas, in Atlanta, my father had leeched my control, and the abusive men who pursued me for my wealth and status had control of me still.
