Page 48 of Hell In A Handbasket
“Don’t be so hard on yourself.You did great.”
“I sent her to watch TV and locked myself in your room.”
“Which is way better than running screaming out of my apartment and leaving her there alone,” I snicker. “Glass is half full. Besides, nothing bad ever happens when Bluey is involved. And since you didn’t answer her questions, she’ll probably save it for when I get home.Great.”
“Good,” she giggles. It’s a watery sound. A tearful, weepy sound. But fuck, it does things to my heart. “Seeing as how it wasyourpenis involved, andyoursemen, you deserve to be the one dealing with that conversation.”
“You’re mean.” I drag my bottom lip between my teeth and ignore the happy yelps and loud splashes from the lake. “The least you could’ve done was come up with some fairytale about grown folks being in love and storks dropping babies on doorsteps.”
“Next time. Now that I have this experience, I’ll be more prepared for the next single dad I meet who has an adorable little girl and a tragic backstory.”
“You looking?”Shut up, Charlie. Shut the fuck up. “Not to sound possessive or anything, but I thought you were saving all your ‘I hate kids, but not this particular one’goodness for just us.”
“I don’t hate kids. I just think they’re…”
“Messy.”
“Yeah.”
“And loud.”
She hums. “Exactly.”
“And totally fucking worth it when you find the one you care about.”
She sighs. “Seems that way. I’m not looking for a single dad to hang out with, Charlie. In fact, I suspect I’d turn around and run really, really fast if I came across one.”
“It’s that bad, huh?” I lose my smile and press my hand to my belly instead. Butterflies are gone, and in their place, stinging hornets. “Knowing us is horrible?”
“Knowing you is…” She considers for a beat. “Hard work.”
“Ouch.”
“It’s a lot,” she explains. “The pressure is heavy, and the risk is massive. We already went through some of it, remember? Me and you. We lost our shit at each other, which flowed over to Mia. Broke her heart. Broke mine.”
Shattered mine.
“Talking to men is low risk. If we get along, we get along. If we don’t, then we stop talking and simply move on. But Mia changes all that. She deserves so much more than someone who comes and goes on a whim with no care at all for the little girl who deserves consistency.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
“You sound like you’ve got one foot out the door already.” Iknewthis was a mistake. Iknewthis was too much. “Give me a minute to call Penny?—”
“My feet are securely inside your apartment. Both of them.”
“Sera—”
“In fact, my feet are securely inside your bedroom. Which is not something I thought I’d ever say. But here we are, and I’m sitting beside your drawers, looking at the foot of your bed. Everything in this apartment smells of you, and it’s sending me nuts.”
“Smells bad?” I turn my face and sniff my armpit. “Do I stink?”
She coughs out a soft laugh. “No. You smell good. Which is ridiculously frustrating, just so you know. Science is entirely too smug about the fact that human beings are attracted to certain scents, and even if we don’t want to be, our brain chemistry is gonna do what it’s gonna do. It’s annoying.”
“So… what I’m hearing is that every time we’re in the same room, you kinda wanna lean in and take a whiff. For science.”
She snorts. “If you say so.”
“What did you wear to bed last night? Did you sneak one of my shirts?”
