Page 57 of Every Now and Then
“Because I needed you just as much, Yankee.”
For a long time, we stand in her foyer, bodies intertwined, without words. I hold her as she cries. The only words that are exchanged are whispers of encouragement—that I’ve got her, that she isn’t alone, that it’s okay to let down her guard because I’ll protect her. My hand cups the nape of her neck, smoothing her hair. My lips drop kisses onto her forehead while her fingers clench the fabric of my shirt.
When her cries slow and then stop altogether, I lead her to the couch in her living room. Sitting down, I tug her onto my lap.
I don’t force her to open up or ask her questions. I simply sit with her in silence, knowing she’ll talk when she’s ready.
When she finally speaks, her voice is ragged. “It’s stupid, but Grace wants a new bicycle. One without training wheels. She picked it out from an online ad she saw on the computer. It’s pink and aqua, and it has a woven basket with flowers on it. I clicked the button to add it to my shopping cart, and when I went to pay for it, it said, ‘Some assembly required.’” Annabelle wipes her eyes as her voice wobbles. “It was just one more thing to add to my never-ending to-do list. One more fucking thing Kyle should be here for. He did none of the holiday shopping, but he always stayed up well past midnight on Christmas Eve putting together gifts for the girls. The play kitchen. The trampoline.” Sitting up, Annabelle laughs quietly. “Like I said, it’s stupid, but—”
“But it’s the little things that are the emotional landmines.”
She nods. “Yeah.”
Combing her hair behind her ear, I offer, “I’d be happy to assemble Grace’s bike, Yankee. I’m pretty handy with a wrench.”
“You’d do that?” The pitch of her voice rises, and I hate that she’s surprised I’d be willing to help her. Before I can answer, she immediately shakes her head. “No, no. I can’t ask you to do that, Hayes. I’ll just paysomeone to do it.”
“I said I’d do it, and I will, Annabelle. No arguing.”
She peers up at me from under her wet eyelashes. “If you’re sure.”
“I am.”
“Okay, then. Thanks.”
“Got any plans for Christmas?”
“This year, I’m simplifying things because the house is on the market, so we can’t do our usual decorating and holiday baking extravaganza.”
“Family coming in town?”
“No. After Kyle died, we haven’t seen much of our families. I think being around us is hard for them because we’re reminders of losing Kyle, and… it’s not easy for me either.” She smiles forlornly before biting her bottom lip. “The day Kyle died, I stumbled upon evidence that he’d been cheating on me.”
“Shit, Annabelle,” I mutter, rubbing comforting circles on her back. When we’d met at Tank’s, Annabelle had been vague in what she told me about the demise of her relationship, but she said enough for me to put the pieces together that he’d been unfaithful. So, her admission doesn’t surprise me.
Although I can’t imagine why any man would ever cheat when he had Annabelle as his wife.
“Yeah, it sucks,” she agrees. “Other than you and Laura, I haven’t told anyone that Kyle cheated on me. I’d like to say I kept it quiet so no one would judge him after his death, but I was also embarrassed.”
“You have nothing to be embarrassed about, Annabelle. The fact that he cheated shows a defect in his character, not yours.”
“Thanks for saying that.”
“I said it because it’s the fucking truth.”
She offers a wan smile and a slow nod, not quite believing me, but appreciating that I said it, anyway. “Since I hid Kyle’s infidelity, it’sdifficult to be around our families. I have to hide my emotions from them, playing the role of the weeping widow, which only fosters my resentment and anger. So, long story not so short, no, we won’t be seeing any relatives for Christmas this year.”
“Maybe a change of scenery would do you wonders? What about if you and the girls pack up and spend Christmas at the ranch with me?”
“Hayes, that’s a… lovely gesture, but I think… I mean, it’s—”
“Annabelle, I don’t want you to pussyfoot around and be polite with me. Speak your truth, Yankee.”
Straightening her shoulders, she glances up at me. “Okay. If it were just me, I’d love to spend Christmas with you at the ranch, but I think it’s too soon for that. I haven’t even told the girls about whatever this is that’s going on between us. I don’t want to confuse them until we’re on the same page about where this is heading, Hayes.”
“Read faster, Annabelle. I already reached the end of the book. I’m just waiting for you to catch up.” Brushing her hair off her shoulder, I cradle her face in my hands. “I want you, but I’m willing to wait for you, Yankee. I’ll wait as long as I need to because I’m not going anywhere.”
20
