Page 207 of A Dagger of Ice and Intrigue
It wasn’t like I’d done anything to endear myself to them or earn their respect–and I was acting absolutely ridiculous, my eyes darting toward the stairs at the end of the atrium.
Ryker still hadn’t come down and the clock had almost struck six in the morning.
“Mrs. Thornbrew gave me extra biscuits,” Geryll announced happily.
His whisper carried through the tense atrium, where warriors counted their weapons and checked their arrows. Eyes swirled from me to him, narrowing.
His head caved between his shoulders, even as he pretended he hadn’t noticed.
Nadya patted his shoulder, standing like a protective shadow behind him, and said loudly, “I have extra pieces of jerky if you want to share.”
Her words hadn’t finished echoing by the time IfeltRyker thundering down the stairs.
Suddenly, I couldn’t breathe.
Through the dark spots dancing in front of my eyes, I barely saw the tips of his boots rushing down the stairs, before I bolted out of the front door.
I couldn’t face him.
I knew I had to, but I was panicked and embarrassed and I didn’t want to make the situation worse in this state.
Trust suddenly felt like a trap, though he hadn’t laid a single snare.
The fortress wall was sleek with ice as I leaned against it, the muscles in my arms spasming out of my control. The bow and quiver dug into my spine. I wanted to slide down and cower until I regained a semblance of command over myself.
I didn’t know what was happening, but nobody could see me like this.
The more breaths I gulped down, the worse the sensation became. Lightheaded and feverish, I looked up toward the sky, not seeing anything except for the bright, crisp light.
“Please,” I begged. Gods, the crater, the stars. Anyone who would listen. “Please help me rid myself of this pain. Yank it from my heart and set me free.Please.”
My power stirred in my arms, sensing I needed help, but I knew better than to call upon Protectorate magic to heal a heart or mind.
I’d tried it, too many times to count.
Our magic simply didn’t work like that. It could change the course of the wind, burn enemies alive, and crack cliffs.
It could contort energy itself, but couldn’t aid the body. From us, it could only sap energy.
“Please.” I closed my eyes, swallowing deeply. “Don’t make me make another mistake. I won’t be able to survive this one.”
I was so afraid of making a wrong step, I wouldn’t allow myself to move.
But I had to.
I was more powerful than this freak out.
I had to be.
Come on, Vegheara.
Get yourself together.
Between the dark spots dancing in my vision, one move. And grew. And approached.
I tried to blink the haze away, only to find myself face to face–well, face to beak–with Sylvester.
The raven landed on the stone steps in front of me, its dark wings shining blue in the sun. He tilted his head and squawked at me.
