Page 64 of Keep Your Guard Up
We sat in silence together for a long while, taking in all of the people around us at Rusty’s.
Surprisingly, I was the one to break it first. “Do you want to know about Jayden?”
His head whipped towards me so fast, I was half expecting it to tear off his head from the momentum. “Lynnie, you don’t have to—”
“You’re my best friend. It’s not about ‘having to’.”
“True, but this is alsothe past. We don’t need to relive it if it’s not affecting the present.”
I loosed a slightly shaking breath. “Jayden and I were together for a long while. Long enough that he started to … want things from me. He started toexpectthings from me.”
JJ narrowed his eyes.
“Things I wasn’t ready for. He tried the nice way, with kindness and patience. But then his patience wore thin—”
“Did he try to force you to—”
“Relax, JJ. Words were exchanged. Outside of Knock’s, Jayden’s never put hands on me.” The mention of Jayden laying a strike on me in Knock’s seemed to only fuel JJ’s anger, so I continued, “He tried to manipulate me, make me feel as if I was the issue in our relationship. As if not being ready to spread my legs made me frigid and soft.”
An involuntary shiver ran down my bones at the word Jayden had used too often.
Soft.
“I broke up with him after all his theatrics. Dad may not have been around much after Mum passed, but I still remembered them together. He never raised a hand or voice to her, and vice versa. I knew I deserved better and that both of them would be devastated to find out I’d stayed with someone who could speak so little of me.”
“They would be proud of you, Lynnie.” His warm, dark hand grabbed mine and squeezed. “Leaving the comfort of reality … it’s never an easy thing to do. No matter how many lines are crossed.”
I nodded, a small and appreciative smile on my lips. JJ’s acceptance, his belief in me, made that silly nagging voice of Jayden’s in my head die off. It was like the volume had been turned down, cut in half, well and truly on its way to muted. I could barely hear the taunts anymore, just quiet aggressive mumbling. As if that little ghost in my head was fighting to stay, fighting to sit on my shoulder some more.
There was no room on my shoulders anymore, not with JJ standing so close to my side.
This time, he was the one to break the silence.
“You know, not all fighters are like him?” he said gently, squeezing my hand again before standing and heading to the counter.
Patty, the sweet, rounded German lady, stood behind the counter. Her rosy cheeks darkened when JJ said something to make her laugh, the two wearing matching grins as they bantered.
JJ was right. Not all fighters were like Jayden. JJ was proof of that. The love, the dedication, and the loyalty my friend had for his people—I saw it. He defied the stereotype I’d created in my head every damned day. The least I could do was show him I believedhimtoo.
Chapter 34
Chance
JJ’s house was ridiculously loud whenever it rained. The wavy tin roof funnelled all the water into the gutters that lined the edging. But the sound of the rain was so rhythmic it was like a hundred kids were up there with pairs of drumsticks.
Over the noise, I barely heard the knock at the door. By the time I reached the rounded, heavy timber, I was ready to throw a fit at the noise consistency in the last thirty minutes. The knocking had become incessant as I got closer and closer, though the person on the other side either hadn’t heard my, ‘I’m coming’ calls or just didn’t care.
The door smacked straight into the wall when I flung it open.
And there she stood. On the porch, arms folded under her chest in an attempt to keep her fingers warm. Her orange Knock’s shirt was soaked all the way through. Though the colour still seemed bright in comparison to all of the baby’s breath that was growing in the front planter boxes.
She was drenched from head to toe. She lightly hopped from foot to foot, a soft squelching sound coming from her grassy shoes.
But those eyes. Something shone in them. Something fierce and brave and passionate.
“Hi.” She smiled, one of those big, beautiful, breathtaking smiles. “Can I come in?”
“Yes!” I cleared my throat. “Uh, yeah, of course.”
