Page 69 of The Red Zone
“You want to stay and hang out?” he asked.
“I don’t really feel like having sex tonight, though.”
“I like to believe we’re capable of hanging out with each other without having to fuck.”
“I don’t know…” I trailed off.
“Just stay.”
“Fine, as long as I get to pick the movie.”
TWENTY-FOUR
OCTOBER
To put it plainly,I was fucked.
Some part of me wondered if I was a goner at six-years-old when Mae came barreling down the street with a handful of worms asking me if I wanted to have lunch with her.
But this—Mae waking up in my bed, yet again—solidified it.
No, we didn’t fuck. We didn’t even cuddle. Not once did she even snuggle up against my back in the middle of the night like usual.
There was something about that last point that struck a chord with me. I hated how she could be in the same bed, two feet away from me and I still felt like she wasn’t close enough. Was it even fucking possible to miss someone who was in the same room as you?
Look, at the end of the day, I was fine if she didn’t want to have sex anymore. Or if she wanted to wear a condom every time. Or wanted me to feed her birth control like a baby bird—alright, maybe that one was a stretch, but you get the point.
We could do whatever she wanted as long as it meant she didn’t go back to hating me. Shipping me off to an unknown island, and putting me in a box that I had no way of opening.
I couldn’t fucking do it. Not again.
Seven years without her was enough. I wasn’t going to let it all go to shit, letting another seven go by without her, all because I was too scared of sorting out my feelings—confessing them—and her not reciprocating.
I’d dealt with her despising me once already, but I wasn’t sure how I’d manage if it happened another time. But something inside me was telling me that I need to take the risk.
Just do it.
Tell her how you feel.
Slipping out of bed, I threw on a sweatshirt as I headed out the front door and marched across the street. Bursting through the front door of Scarlett and Abel’s house without knocking. Scar stood in the kitchen with a cookie scoop in hand, placing little balls of batter onto a pan.
“I like her.”
“You what?” She perked up like I’d just told her the best news she’d ever heard.
“I like her. I like Mae.”
“Finally!” Scarlett lifted her hands in the air like the fans at games when we scored a touchdown, although she flung some of the cookie dough from her scoop onto the cabinet behind her. “Operation Red to the Red is goingexactlyaccording to schedule.”
“You keep saying that, but you’ve never told me what ‘operation red to the red’ actually is?”
“It’s my game plan to get you and Mae to realize that you’re perfect for each other,” she said matter-of-factly.
“You’ve really got to stop barging into my fucking house unannounced.” Abel’s voice boomed through the house as he rounded the corner into the kitchen.
“Jesus Christ, can’t you see this is an emergency of utmost importance?” Scarlett gasped. I tried to bite back a laugh as Abel looked like a dog with his tail tucked between his legs. “Good, now get over here and help us strategize.”
“Wait… if you like her then what do we need to strategies about?” Scarlett lifted a brow at me.
