Page 84 of Crash
Her heart melted at his confession. “I miss you, too. But what do you see of our future?” She needed to know.
“Quynh,” Griffin reached over and gripped her hands, “the only future I see is you. Wherever you are is where I want to be. It’s where I need to be.”
She was at a loss for words. Her eyes watered as she took in his heartfelt words.
“Do you really mean that?” Her voice was thick with unshed tears.
“I do.” His tone brooked no arguments.
“You do?” She bit down on her lower lip.
“Absolutely. We will figure everything out. Together.”
Before she knew what was happening, Griffin scooped her up and placed her on his lap.
“I need to tell you something. I’ve told no one this before.” His voice trailed off. Quynh looked at his pinched expression. Her heart raced as she prepared herself for the worst.
“Okay. What is it?”
“I—well, there’s really no other way to say this, but…I’m an addict. Recovered. Drugs and alcohol.” His voice was rushed as if he needed to get them out before he lost his nerve.
She stared at Griffin in shock.
“My father was an alcoholic. He gambled too, but his drug of choice was alcohol. My mother left when I was young. I don’t know much about her.” Griffin paused as he looked off into the distance. Quynh rubbed her hands across his shoulders, not sure what to do with herself but wanting to soothe him. This was obviously causing him distress to relive old memories.
“I started drinking when I was really young. Did somestupid shit, too. Drugs and girls were part of my life for a while until…” Griffin gulped. “Until I killed my best friend.”
Quynh’s heart dropped. She tried not to react or judge, instead waiting patiently to hear the rest of the story. A part of her was proud he trusted her with this part of himself.
“He was driving us home from a party. We had no business being in the car. I fell asleep, and the next thing I knew, I woke up to the car being flipped upside down. He…he died on impact.” His voice choked on the last word. “I’ll never forget the way he looked. They needed to use the jaws of life to get us out, but it was too late for him.”
She rested her head on his shoulder, giving him time to process his traumatic memories. She placed a kiss on his neck, reassuring him she was still there with him.
“It wasn’t your fault, you know,” she murmured softly against his side.
“I know that now, but I’m telling you this because my fucked up past…It’s a big part of who I am. I quit drinking and drugs. It wasn’t easy, but I did it. Old Man Murphy took me under his wing and helped me get out from under the shadow of my father. Murphy left me the auto shop when he died a few years ago. And that apartment that you’ve been staying in? That’s where I lived for a while before I built the house across the street.”
Griffin took in a deep breath, his hand coming up to cup the back of her neck as he pulled her in so he could see her. She stared into his expressive eyes, watching the emotions flickering through them. Fear. Anger. Loss. She knew it took a lot for him to tell her about his past.
She leaned forward and kissed him, his lips automatically welcoming hers. She pulled away before he could deepen the kiss, not wanting to distract from the gravity of his words.
“Thank you for telling me.”
“Yeah. I know I’m fucked up, and I’m hard to be around. I don’t deserve you, but I need you.”
She smiled at his gruff words.
“I don’t deserve you,” she finally said and refrained from laughing at his huff of disbelief. “It’s true. You’re strong, and you’re brave. It takes hard work to straighten yourself out. You took a tragedy and remade yourself. Look at how successful and respected you are. Everyone in Willowbrook has nothing but great things to say about you.”
He narrowed his eyes in disbelief.
“I need to tell you something.” Now it was her turn to share. “I’m not very good at being in relationships. I’ve always had this fear of being abandoned…and I have a bad habit of leaving before I’m left, if you know what I mean.”
“I know.” He tilted his head at her in a comical gesture.
“I’m sorry that I reverted to my old habits. I was…. scared.”
“Scared? Of what?”
