Page 48 of A Translation of Desire
Chapter Sixteen
Rose glared atthe gentleman barreling down on her at Lady Halethorpe’s ball. She’d already danced with two men tonight, well, more like stumbled through the steps. She would not do it again, especially when all they wanted was for her to confirm and provide details on the outrageous dowry her father had saddled her with.
She cursed her father even though he wasn’t in the country. Hell, Rose wished she weren’t in England. That wasn’t exactly true. She wanted to spend more time with Augustus. Knowing that her desire to spend time with the man prevented her from wanting to leave England disconcerted Rose. It made her uncomfortable that a single person held such sway over her.
Tomorrow night, she and Augustus would confront Mr. Abbas. Excitement swirled through her at the prospect of recovering the tablets, but her body flared with anticipation at the thought of spending time with Augustus. The man and his thighs were never far from her mind. She didn’t even realize she liked men’s legs until she met him.
A beautiful, petite blonde lady entered the ballroom as the butler announced, “Lady Gillings.”
The room increased in chatter as ladies went to greet her. Who was she? Rose studied her. She smiled as women talked to her animatedly, but a feeling of melancholy seemed to drift around her. Addie joined her, grinning. “Do you know who that is?”
“The butler just announced her.”
Addie shook her head. “No, who she is to Sinclair?”
Rose swiveled to face Addie. “What do you mean?”
“Years ago, society suspected she would marry Sinclair, but then she gave him up for someone who wasn’t a duke. For a love match.”
Lady Gillings was almost Augustus’s person. A wave of jealousy coursed through Rose, and she hated that she couldn’t prevent it. She didn’t respond to Addie’s comments but turned back to study the woman. She was beautiful and would have made a remarkable duchess. Her bearing exuded a grace that, no matter how hard Rose tried, she would never be able to achieve.
The lady was alone. Where was this great love? She frowned in disbelief that this personification of perfection could have resisted Augustus. “Where is her husband?”
“That is the saddest part. He passed away from an illness two years ago. She’s been in mourning. I’d heard she was returning but hadn’t seen her out and about.”
Had Augustus seen her? Why did her heart feel as if someone was squeezing it so tightly that it was hard to breathe? The woman beamed at a gentleman who offered his arm for a dance. She took it demurely, and Rose continued to watch her as she moved about the dance floor.
A deep sense of loss filled her because even though she didn’t want it to be so, this was Augustus’s match in every way. She turned away, remembering Addie was standing with her. She’d likely seen the many emotions that passed over her face based on her concerned frown.
“I didn’t realize—” Addie began, but Rose shook her head. “You assume wrong.”
Her friend looked at her skeptically. “What Sinclair had with that lady was years ago. They were so young.”
Rose sighed. “I don’t need your reassurance. Sinclair and I are friends, actually more like business associates.”
“It wouldn’t be surprising if you like him,” Addie insisted.
Rose tilted her chin up. “I would never like someone like Sinclair. A man who has never left England and finds the rules of propriety important.”
Addie didn’t look like she believed her, and she knew why. Rose wasn’t sure she believed herself. Lady Gillings and her ladylike qualities complemented Augustus perfectly. With her, he could build a life. With Rose, he could only have a few moments in time. She would leave soon, and he would stay here running his vast estate with a proper lady by his side. A lady like Lady Gillings.
“Rose—”
“I don’t want to discuss this anymore.”
“I’m only trying to help.”
Rose wouldn’t talk to her about Sinclair and angrily said, “I don’t bother you about Lord Hawley, so please stop bringing this up.”
They both knew she’d revealed far more than she intended at that moment. Sinclair mattered to her, and Addie now knew it.
They stood silently observing those dancing. Rose owed Addie an apology for her harsh words but didn’t feel like she could speak right now. She swallowed the lump in her throat. Startling her, Addie looped her arm through Rose’s. “Enough of all of this. Let’s go find some champagne.”
Rose nodded, forcing a smile. “I would like that. I’m sorry—”
Addie shook her head. “No. Don’t do that. You never have to apologize to me. Emotions and men make a muck of all women’s lives at some point or another. If I had a choice, I’d pick one that looked like Sinclair too.”
Rose shook her head, and Addie said, “I know you have no interest in talking about it. That is fine with me. Champagne will fix whatever you’re not feeling for the man.”
