Page 115 of In For a Penny
“Penny…” he murmurs. “I think I’ve reached my limit.” He starts to gently push me away with a laugh. “I might spontaneously combust if we don’t stop soon.” He chuckles sheepishly.
“I don’t want to stop.” I kiss Josh again, my tongue sliding against his, and I bow my body into his suggestively. I pull away and look him in the eye as understanding dawns on him. His arm wraps around my lower waist, and he pulls me roughly against him. I push against his chest, and he rolls me on top of him. I straddle his hips, shifting forward slightly, rubbing against his length, and he groans. His hands travel up my back to my zipper, deliberately pulling it slowly down to tease me. I push the fabric off both my shoulders, and he reaches around behind my back to unclasp my bra.
“Jesus,” he says, closing his eyes, as if collecting himself for a second.
“You want to stop?” I ask nervously, biting my lip.
He answers by pulling me down by the waist and rolling over me, crushing his lips to mine. “Hell no.” He rises up on his knees and slides the fabric down my waist, over my hips, and down my legs. He crawls over me, eyes never leaving mine, and he settles in between my legs. Josh kisses me slow and heavy, hands grazing my skin, cupping my breasts. He shifts his hips forward, and I moan, arching into him.
I’ve imagined the moment Josh and I would be together like this so many times, but the real thing doesn’t even come close. I’ve never felt this way before. With Oliver, it was hunger, but with Josh it’s pureneed. Like I can’t get closer to him fast enough. Like I won’t be able to keep breathing until we’re together. Like I need him to survive. It’s like I want him to hurry so we can get there but slow down at the same time so that I can savor him.
He’s wearing too many clothes. “Shirt. Off. Now,” is all I manage to say in between pants. He obliges and starts unbuttoning from the top, but he’s taking too long. I untuck the shirt from his pants and help him unbutton from the bottom. Our hands meet in the middle, and I push his shirt over his shoulders and start kissing his chest, his collarbone, his neck. He pushes me back down by the shoulders and kisses me, his tongue tasting me. My hands travel down his bare chest, scratching lightly, until they reach his belt. I unbuckle it hastily and slip my hand inside, feeling him. He groans and drops his forehead to my shoulder when I make contact. “Fuck, Penny,” he says, his breathing ragged.
Josh pulls my hands away and unbuttons his pants. I help push them off. His lips meet mine again, but he stops. “Wait, wait.” He shakes his head.
“No. No waiting, Josh. I’m so tired of fighting this. Aren’t you?” I ask desperately. “Don’t you want me?” I ask in a small voice.
“Wantyou?” Josh looks surprised by the question, like he never expected it to come out of my mouth. “Penny, I’ve imagined this moment so many times in my head…” He takes a deep breath. “You havenoidea. I love you, Penny.”
My face breaks out into a huge smile.
He loves me.
I slide my hands into his hair and pull him back down to me. Josh quickly helps remove my panties first and then slides his underwear off. I reach my hand out, yanking the drawer of my nightstand open, searching for a condom, which I pass to him. Josh quickly tears the foil package open with his teeth and rolls it onto himself.
My hands slide into his hair, and I look into his eyes. Josh’s right hand travels slowly down my side, fingertips grazing my skin, barely touching me all the way down. He stops at my left knee and hooks it over his hip, holding it tightly to his body as he slowly enters me. I’m dizzy and breathless, and my chest tightens with emotion. Josh drops his forehead to mine in a groan, and I moan out his name against his mouth. The relief of the feel of him inside me is monumental—like everything is finally right in the world. There is no panic. There is no concern. Josh presses his lips to mine and pulls back slowly then pushes in hard and fast. I gasp.
Josh rolls me over him and sits up so that we’re eye to eye, feeling him deeper still. His hands slide down to my hips, holding tight, fingers digging all the way down to my bones. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and press my forehead to his. He pulls me down roughly as he shifts his hips in an upwards movement, and my head snaps back in pleasure with a moan. “Again,” I beg, and he repeats the same movement over and over again, creating a jagged rhythm.
He stills. “Penny,” he says my name tightly, as if he’s trying to hold on. “Look at me,” he says. I know he’s watching me, but I can’t keep my eyes open. It’s too much. I close my eyes even tighter and shake my head, pursing my lips, not wanting to say anything. “Open,” Josh says in a pant, “I need to see you.”
I slowly open my eyes and stare into his. “I love you,” he says and kisses me slow and deep as we continue our rhythm. It’s so intense, so intimate, it leaves me breathless. I feel my eyes sting, but I manage to control myself. His lips travel down my neck, stopping at my shoulder, and he bites me lightly. One of his hands slides in between our bodies, and he touches me just right, his movements precise.
“Oh God,” I groan. “I’m close,” I say.
Josh rolls us over, and I’m suddenly on my back again. He hooks my legs over his arms, spreading me wide. He’s grinding into me faster, rougher now, and I’m so close. It’s right there, it’s…
Oh. My. God.
My back arches off the mattress as I start to come. I grab his left hand and hold it tight for support. Josh whispers my name over and over again as a wave of pleasure ripples through my entire body. It feels like it goes on forever. His back goes tense under my fingertips, his body in between my legs. He buries his face in my neck, and I feel him press deep inside me one last time, groaning in relief.
“Fuck,” he says in between pants.
“I love you, too, by the way,” I whisper after a few seconds of silence as my hands trail up and down his back. He laughs, face still buried in my neck.
“Good.” I feel him nod. “That’s really good.” Josh releases my legs and rolls us on our sides. He crushes my head to his chest, still inside me, kissing the top of my head. I snuggle closer into that nook on his shoulder, breathing him in.
